"Problems With Ejaculation"

Ejaculation is an innate apex of a sexual act experienced by men. It is a medium of pleasure that all men look forward to and is the main objective of getting married as it is the vital demand of human instinct. There are various ways to achieve ejaculation that are learnt instinctively, and out of curiosity.

Nevertheless, everything is not as good as it seems. Sexual dysfunctions are getting very common nowadays. Basically, the increasing number of psychosocial, psychological, and physical dysfunctions are due to the metropolitan outspread and increasing pollution of planet earth.

Delayed ejaculation

Regardless of how we got to this point, let’s talk about a specific sexual dysfunction, commonly known as delayed ejaculation. The term delayed ejaculation refers to the inability to ejaculate and it is quite an untoward situation where a man is unable to ejaculate.

Psychological problems

One of the common forms of ejaculation is where a man is unable to ejaculate in the company of his partner. If a man is unable to ejaculate in the presence of his partner, but can ejaculate normally while alone after some sort of sexual stimulation, then the reason behind such a dysfunction is wholly solely psychological.

Men suffering from such a dysfunction usually have orthodox religious backgrounds and are generally taught that sex is a sin. One of the other reasons is that that a man is simply not attracted to his partner.

Sometimes a trauma or a traumatic situation can lead to this dysfunction as well. For example, if a man finds out that his partner is cheating on him and is having an affair with someone else or if he is being caught by his partner while having sex or masturbating, then these traumatizing situations can make him too distressed to attain ejaculation.

Sometimes, it does so happen that men are unable to ejaculate while masturbating, whereas they are leading a normal sex life. This sort of dysfunction is also due to some of the reasons that are explained above in detail.

Masturbation as a sin

Most of the religions consider masturbation as a big sin and the followers of such religions are taught to refrain from developing sinful habits like these.

So, in such a case, where your mind is distracted by religious teachings, it can be difficult for you to have an intimate feeling for your partner. You cannot force or wear a feeling on yourself. So, if you are suffering from such a problem, seek professional help immediately. Go to your physician to get a referral to a therapist that can help both you and your partner.

Basically, the therapist will explain about all the sexual stimulation and responses and will help you to understand your sexual needs. The therapist might recommend a treatment if necessary and can psychologically talk you out of such a situation.

Just relax

Ideally, you can stimulate yourself and your partner by just relaxing. Relaxation is the key to intimacy. Now, in order to be intimate, the best thing for you to do is to have a romantic candle light dinner, have some wine, and if both of you think that porn can stimulate you in a better manner, then go for it. Avoid unnecessary conversations that can lead to an argument. Just relax and try to have some fun by hugging and kissing each other and try not to hustle yourself into having sex. Remember, take your time and just relax.

It is very important for you to know that a muscle, known as pubococcygeus muscle should be under your control, as relaxing and tensing of this muscle is sometimes very helpful. In order to train your PC muscle, you should consider a Penis Health exercise program that has a series of healthy exercises.

"Types of Condoms and What Women Like About Them"

It seems as if every time you turn around there is a new kind of condom on the market. There is a rainbow of color, a plethora of sizes and more flavors than you can count out there. The days of the one size fits all condom are long gone, never to return.

Textured condoms

Textures are one of the biggest selling points when it comes to these new fangled condoms. There are ribbed condoms for a more pleasurable experience for women as well as thinner (yet still durable) ones for men.

There are even studded condoms that are textured on the inside and the outside, this is great news for both men and women!

The sheer number of condom varieties is near impossible to count but it is important to note that while the brands may differ there are still basically eight different categories of condoms.

What are condoms made from?

The vast majority of condoms are made with either polyurethane or latex.

The size of the condoms you purchase is also an important consideration. And this category is not just about length but width as well, so keep that in mind when you are shopping for condoms.

Many men will find that they need to shop at specialty shops for condoms that fit them well because most drugstores sell only standard sizes. There is nothing worse than a condom that doesn’t fit well.

Lubrication is another important factor to consider. If you have any specific allergies then you will want to read the labels carefully since not all of them are made with the same ingredients.

A good condom

Now what are the qualities of a good condom, for material, latex is probably the best; avoid the naturally made ones such as lamb membrane. Some individuals claim that STD’s can go through latex but this is untrue.

When picking a lubricant the water-based ones are the best like those that are already pre-lubricated with spermicidal gel or foam. Petroleum, baby oil’s or cream should not be used as a lubricant as they can tend to weaken the condom, even the latex ones.

What do women want?

Specifically, what condom would a woman want? French ticklers (condoms with long appendages) or those with ridges can increase pleasure during intercourse. For the same purpose a woman may insist on the ultra thin type of condom.

Lastly, and maybe the most interesting fact is that women generally do not care about all the fancy ridges, ribs or the lubricant.

The problem found is that condoms are generally designed by men, for men. A study has shown that if women were to design a condom they would just make it padded, as although the length may not be critical, according to her, the width does.

"Health Benefits of the Male Orgasm"

We all understand the power of sex. It’s more than just a reproductive function of human beings, its something we derive pleasure from. It’s a pleasure which most people find incomparable to any other feeling on earth-even love.

We are influenced constantly by sex in our daily lives, the media knows this and it’s evident by the sexual undertones in everything marketed to us from perfumes to cell phones.

The orgasm

Sex wouldn’t be sex if not for the orgasm. The ultimate goal of every form of sexual activity is to arrive at this one explosive moment that is the peak of all sexual pleasure.

The pleasure of a particular sex session is easily quantified by the nature of the orgasm derived from it.

With function of the orgasm seemingly related to sexual pleasure alone, few people know of the health benefits that are associated with the orgasms we experience during sex. Recent health studies have showed a strong link with orgasms and the general health and well being of the male body.

The health benefits

One individual , Dr Alfred Kinsey started out with research in the 1950’s to try and understand what other functions and benefits humans could derive from sex other than reproduction and pleasure. One outcome of Dr Kinsey’s study was the discovery that people who engaged in more sex and had frequent orgasm were less prone to stress and violent tendencies.

Later studies revealed other amazing discoveries. These discoveries included the fact that people who engaged in frequent sexual activity and had orgasms had a lower mortality rate when compared with their less sexually active counterparts. (Duke University, 1970s and Caerphilly, 1997). For women an active sex life also bears some correlation with a lower risk of heart disease (Psychosomatic Medicine, 1976).

Other individuals and researchers such as Dudley Chapman a Gyaenacologist have since made other discoveries showing that an active sex life helps the body combat infections and disease better.

Reducing cancer

In men, frequent ejaculation induced by orgasms has been found to reduce the liability of the male body to develop prostrate cancer. This discovery was as a result of work carried out by researchers in Melbourne, Australia. Other benefits such as a reduction in the risk of pain during urination on the attainment of old age have also been noted among researchers in other fields.

Clearly these results from researchers show that human beings were meant to have sex, enjoy it and stay healthy from it. Lack of a healthy sex life and corresponding healthy orgasms affects the body in a negative way, in order to counter these problems an active sexual life and healthy orgasms are needed.

"Sensual Massage"

It is very important for your lover to know that you are crazy about her and love her with all your heart and soul.

Make her feel special

To make her feel special, take her out to somewhere romantic or surprise her by arranging a candle light dinner at home. After dinner, just tell her how beautiful she is and tell her that you want to give her a massage.

Don’t fool her by saying her that you want to massage her and just rush her into sexual activities. Try to take one step at a time.

Relax and have fun

At this point, forget about all your worries and just concentrate on having a great time and making her feel the ecstasy of your love.

A romantic song can make your work a lot easier, so one or two CDs of cool romantic songs may come in handy.

Now, the other things that you require are a few scented candles, scented or unscented massage oil, a few clean towels, and a clean sheet underneath to prevent everything else from getting oil stains.

The perfect massage

Start massaging her shoulders in a gentle manner in a clockwise motion in order to make her feel relaxed.

While massaging her shoulders give her a kiss or two at the back of her neck and tease her by stimulating some of her erogenous areas, but don’t touch the breasts or the vagina yet. Just slowly rub your body against hers and don’t leave out any part of the body.

When you are at the final of the massage and you are massaging the most erogenous zones, just keep your pace and don’t start massaging her hastily. While massaging, make sure that she is enjoying it throughout and if at any point you observe or feel that she is becoming uncomfortable, just pamper her a bit and give her a while to breathe.

Before starting the massage of the most sensitive parts, ask her if she wants you to massage these areas or not. If she wants you to go on, then start massaging her outer lips gently and then go on massaging the clitoris and the G-spot. If she is comfortable with the use of sex toys and you are comfortable with using them too, then you can massage her with a vibrator as well.

"Erotic Massage"

Erotic massage is the best way to get a sturdy orgasm and you will feel all refreshed and calm. A sexual state for a greater extent is attained and maintained with the help of erotic massages. Erotic massages are very beneficial for men suffering from premature ejaculation, as these massages can turn them on without ejaculation.

Getting in the mood

Some people massage erotically to enhance the mood. If you have romantic and stimulating CDs, they will help you a lot as well with the combination of a scented oil massage to relax the nerves of your lover.

As you know, you should not rush to massage the genitals. Massage her body all over, knead her stomach gently, massage her pelvic muscles to make her feel relaxed and by you touching her sensually will turn her on and this turned on state will be maintained for quite a while.

Bite her ear gently and tell her that you love her body and she is the hottest woman you have ever seen.

Now, when she is totally into you, go ahead and massage the most tender spots of her body. Go slowly, let her feel your love, as the more gentle you are, the more pleasure you will give and receive.

"Erogenous Zones: Stimulation Techniques"

Here you will be learning different techniques of stimulating the female erogenous zones.

If you want to become a successful lover you should know how to please a woman and make her feel satisfied. By reading further, you will be able to learn as to what works and why, and how can you create and discover new techniques if need be.

Men and women are different

Most of the people, either men or women think that they and their partner have same sexual interests.

Men almost have the same interest in getting touched the same way over and over again. But women are a bit different as they are not ready to be touched all the time and basically like to be turned on properly before moving onto the main action.

So, what you need to do is to get your partner in a playful mood and turn her on by doing all the techniques we taught you before.

After having a romantic dinner, just check out if your lady wants to go into the foreplay mode or not. Mostly men thinks that it is boring and rush into having sex, but it is only in your best interest to enjoy the foreplay mode as women love it. Foreplay is basically when you are exploring and building up the passion for having a great time with your partner.

Learn how to judge different situations

Judging different situations is what we can’t teach you and you have to learn to self-judge some situations. Let me give you an example: As you know almost all women like to be kissed and loved, but you have to show her, your true passion and love.

Do not focus mainly on the body of women, respect them, listen to them, try to understand them, talk to them, and let them know that you love them individually not just their bodies.

Don’t create a feeling of awkwardness, for example if you are kissing her and she is not responding, stop right at that moment and ask her as to how she is feeling, show her that you really care about her.

If at sometime she tells you to stop kissing or stop doing whatever you are doing at that moment to her, go ahead and stop right at that moment and try to talk to her, try to share her problems and make her feel good.

Body signs

Reading the body signs is one of the skill that you should master. She will guide you to treat her the way she wants you to in her own way, try to read her body language and let her guide you to give her the best experience ever.

So, to sum it up, read as much as you can, absorb all the information and try to experiment it. Don’t push her to do anything, but be a bit firm, don’t let her feel that you are controlling her, but be in control, listen to her, be gentle, and let her know and feel that you are not going to harm her in anyway and you are enjoying as much being with her as she is being with you.

"Erogenous Zones: How to Find Them"

If you want to be a perfect lover, you have to be curious and you should strive to learn to be the best in giving pleasure to your lady. Along with these skills you should be keen enough to explore and attain more knowledge.

As we all know that internet has given us the access to zillions of porn sites, but sadly most men are not able to discover every nook and corner of a vagina yet. All they see is some pink flesh covered in hair. It is almost impossible for some men to find the clitoris and are not learned enough when it comes to the erogenous areas of a female body.

Feeling shy?

It is quite surprising to know that some men are quite shy and feel lucky if they are able to get in bed with some woman and just don’t explore the body of their partner to the fullest and just can’t experiment anything.

Some men are not shy, but are not into experimenting or exploring and they have a valid reason. And the reason is that that what if their partner feels weird about them and can tell them “back off you wacko. So, men with a sense of control can handle situations like this a lot more easier than a shy person.

Looking after yourself

A good look matters. Even today some men think that looking good does not matter at all. Well, it’s their point of view and we respect it even though it is wrong to some extent.

You do not have to be stunningly beautiful, but you can look good by wearing clean clothes and taking care of your hygiene.

Turn your partner on through masturbation

Masturbation is the key to turn on your lady. If you and your partner are in a mood to have a best night time ever, you should start conversing about masturbation.

If your partner is a shy person and does not share her intimate secrets with you, try to talk her out of it and tell her to masturbate.

She might be stimulating her clitoris in order to masturbate and you will be able to have a good look as to what she is doing and how she is doing it.

Be gentle while conversing and don’t spill all your emotions on her and give her some space. If masturbation does not interest her or she is shy to share this little detail with you, don’t push her to do so.

What are the main erogenous zones?

The main erogenous areas are the clitoris and the perineum, but these areas cannot be easily accessed.

The clitoris is one of the most sensitive spots and is responsible for orgasms and for your information the only job that clitoris does is of giving pleasure. Orgasms that are more common in women are clitoris orgasm.

To pull it off, you should ask your partner to show you the intimate parts of her body and if you are lucky she might consider your request.

Try to explore your partner

If you are the one in control and your lady allows you to explore around, then you should exactly know the locations of the erogenous areas.

For example: Clitoris is sited above the intersection of the two inner lips, biologically known as labia minora.

You have to use your fingers delicately to separate out these lips and make sure that your nails are properly clipped. Now, the hood, commonly known as the rosebud will be visible.

Basically, the clitoris is covered partially or fully by a hood and this differs from one woman to another. You have to be very gentle when using your fingers or lips on the clitoris. If the sensation is overwhelming for your partner, then give her a while to recuperate.

The second most sensitive erogenous zone is the perineum and you must learn to stimulate it on your own. It is sited between the lower intersection of the labia minora and the anus.

It is a very sensitive area and can be stimulated in various ways to give pleasure. Even men like their perineum to be pressed while ejaculating. The perineum basically enhances the pleasure and can make your partner beg for more.

"Erogenous Zones: How to Find Them

"Erogenous Zones: How to Find Them

"Erogenous Zones: How to Find Them

"Erogenous Zones: How to Find Them

"Top Things Women Hate About Men"

The relationship between men and women has always been a love-hate type. This article will describe what a woman finds most annoying in her partner. Though this is a much debated topic, we know for sure that a woman never likes a man who is weak or shows too much of interest in her initially. Similarly there are many points that psychologists have tried to analyze. It would be very easy to put it down in a few simple points, but perhaps it is best to debate this topic by asking questions. How would you feel if you see your man with another woman enjoying a cup of coffee at the coffee shop around the street corner? Chances are, you would feel a sense of jealousy, even if the woman is just an office colleague who just wanted to feel a little relaxed. This is just an example and hundreds more can be cited. Any relationship can survive just on one sentence Trust me and I will never let you down. If you really mean it, this can be the foundation of any statement.

Many Psychoanalysts often point out that women often contradict themselves while expressing what they desire and do not desire in men. Though women publicly admit that they like men who are strong, secretly they like a man on whom she can wield certain amount of power. Well for all the men reading this article, the Billy Joel song She is always a woman for me is how we would love to define her. No matter what, men will always enjoy the company of women. Let me now bring out certain points which women definitely find annoying in a man. Imagine your boyfriend calling you up every 15 minutes, when you are in the middle of a busy road. Regardless of how much you love your partner, this can become very irritating, as you would feel you are free to be on your own, due to the constant phone calls.

Now imagine you are on a first date and he starts talking about the amount of money that he has made in the stock markets or the new Ferrari that he has bought. I am sure more often than not a woman would not like to hear about these things on the first date. While do talk about what they do for a living on first dates, it is usually considered annoying and ruse for someone to brag about their earnings.

It is also likely (majority of the times) that a woman would not like a person who would show insensitivity towards her feelings. This is a mistake that many men make and women do not like this attitude from them. There are many other factors that women generally do not like in men such as arrogance, lies, submissive behavior, etc. Never ever show a woman that you have a weak character. This is one of the traits that women dislike in a man. It is a mistake that many men make by making a woman feel that he is ready to fall at her feet. Contrary to a man's thinking that a woman would appreciate it, women get annoyed with men who are too submissive and ready to do anything for her. This does not mean that a woman does not want a sensitive man who is open about his feelings, but it does mean that a woman still wants a man to be his own person, think for himself and claim what he wants from a relationship.

A woman's relationship with a man is very delicate and she looks for a strong shoulder to rest her head. A woman always likes a man who has a big heart and ready to share and care. A self-centered man is rarely loved by women and more often than not will crave for female company. You are setting yourself up for failure, if you show undue interest in other women when you are with a woman. This is a behavior that women dislike and will definitely put her off. Manipulative attitude is something that women dislike in a man. Hence, try to be as open in your behavior as possible and at the same time do not fall prey if she displays manipulative behavior. Keeping these points in mind, you can win over a woman. Remember that love blossoms slowly and you need to give your woman time and space if you really want to win her over. We have tried to explore few points that make a woman annoyed with a man. There may be many more and hence it is always advisable that you always be yourself when you are on your initial dates.

"Stimulate The Breasts"

But you have to be aware of the fact that each and every girl is different in all respects. You cannot stimulate or seduce every girl the same way. There are some girls who want their man to fondle their breasts, but they don’t like it when it comes to stimulating their tits. So, try to be creative and think or even ask her directly if she would like you to do something or not.

Well, I don’t have to tell you that tits are of various shapes and sizes and so are boobs.

If you have small breasts and you are thinking that you cannot attract any man, then you are totally wrong, as some men love girls with small breasts and some men like huge breasts, so you are going to get all the male attention.

Scientists have done studies and they have found that girls with big tits have more fun while having sex, but their tits are not that much sensitive to touch.

Girls with small sized tits enjoy the sensation that can make them go crazy as their perky little tits are very much sensitive to touch.

So, it is pretty evident that when you will nibble a small tit, you are turning your girl really horny, but a girl with bigger tits won’t get turned on to that extent if you will stimulate her tits.

Breasts And Pleasure

The brown place on the boobs is called the areola and it is very sensitive to touch and the bigger the brown nipple surface area, the more pleasure you can give to your girl.

The areola or the brown area has a lot of nerve endings and sometimes the sensations on stimulation can be overwhelming, and she can reach her climax just by stimulating her nipple area.

Some girls do have inverted nipples, but don’t worry girls, you can get as much fun as any other ordinary girl with big or small tits.

Be Firm, But Not Too Rough

Now, a little piece of advice for men who love to give special attention to the boobs, be firm in your approach, when you are sucking and fondling, but be gentle.

Don’t be too aggressive to give a bruise to your girl, as she won’t like it and it can also cause some serious health problems to her.

While biting on the nipples try to avoid to tear or break-in the skin and don’t even think of using the nipple clippers.

While squeezing the boobs, make sure that you are not squeezing them like a ball, think that you are squeezing a balloon filled with water, you know what I mean right. Treat her like she is special to you and tell her that you cannot think of hurting her in anyway and she will be all over you and will allow you to be all over her.

Use Your Tongue

Some naughty experts say that if a woman has big boobs, the best way to tease and please her is to make her lay on her back and start tantalizing the area outside the breasts below the armpits.

Feel free to use your tongue and fingertips in a gentle flicking rhythm and nibble a bit as you are working on her boobs. Well, you are one lucky girl if your boy is paying too much attention to you and is doing everything to please you.

Be Creative

You cannot use the same technique every time. You have to be creative in inventing places to please your woman and make her moan for more.

If you are in a relationship with a woman who has an infant child and she is breastfeeding her, then be as gentle as possible, as her baby has given her enough sucking for the day. So, just drop the idea of sucking her boobs for a while and if she wants you to fondle her breasts, then concentrate on the underneath part.

"JUST A BIT OF FUN"

Great Sex: Finding Your G-Spot

The debate over the g-spot seems to never end. Does it exist, is it important, should it be talked about, does it have any usefulness? Definitive answers are rare, so while the experts debate, why not do your own research, and get to the heart (or would it be gheart) of the matter. Many women can stimulate their g-spot using their fingers. Some people will find it easier using a toy that is curved, either a dildo or a vibrator.

Difficulty: N/A

Time Required: You might find your g-spot immediately, or it could take several attempts. Don't pressure yourself.


1. Avoid performance pressure about the "magic spot".

People can become fixated on achieving a sexual goal (multiple orgasms, simultaneous orgasm, g-spot orgasms) One thing I can promise is that this is the best way to NOT enjoy any sort of sexual encounter. Remember that sexual exploration is mostly about the journey, not the destination (although the destination is better than most, I’ll agree). Try not to make this another notch in your “sexually self-actualized” belt.

2. Turn yourself on.

Any homework that starts with this is bound to be somewhat fruitful. The spongy area around the g-spot gets engorged with blood when you’re sexually aroused, so it is much easier to find and feel when you’re turned on.

3. Get comfortable and find the g-spot area.

Lie on your back, squat, or lie on your stomach. Place your palm face down on your vulva and slowly insert a finger inside your vagina (use lube if you’re feeling a little dry), crooking it forward in a “come hither” motion. When you’re up to about the second knuckle you should feel a slightly bumpy or ridged area on the upper wall of your vagina.

4. Notice how the g-spot feels.

The texture of the g-spot area will likely be noticeably different from the typically smooth walls of the vagina. When you’re aroused it can expand, so feel it at different times during your arousal to get familiar with its contours and sensitivity. The g-spot responds to pressure, so press down and pull forward using that "come hither" motion with your fingers.

5. Explore the g-spot with toys.

For some it can be awkward to stimulate the g-spot by hand. A g-spot vibrator or dildo can be a great helper in this. Apply a little lube to your toy, and insert it with the tip (if it’s curved) pointing up toward the top wall of your vagina. Work it in slowly, far enough (a couple of inches) so the tip is pressing against your g-spot.

6. Experiment with pressure and motion.

Some women will find pressure against the g-spot pleasurable, some women like the feeling vibration when a toy is pressing against the g-spot. Experiment and see if either feels good for you. For most women, the g-spot responds to firm pressure. In the beginning, use your toy as if you were trying to scratch an itch—don’t pull the toy all the way out, but use short strokes, applying firm pressure, against the g-spot.

7. Vary the movements.

A circular or back-and-forth motion may be necessary to get you started, but you might soon graduate to a more vigorous thrusting. If you’ve got a vibrator, try playing with the vibrations both on and off to see which you like better.

8. Add clitoral stimulation to g-spot play.

You’ll know you’re hitting the spot as you feel tingly sensations, the urge to pee, and an overall elevation in your arousal. When you feel the urge to come, stimulate your clitoris using your favorite method. Keep stroking your g-spot.

9. Let go.

With continued stimulation, you’ll eventually feel a sensation much like having to pee. This can be quite disconcerting at first, and has probably led plenty of women to abandon the process, but if you stick with it you’ll be in for a pleasant surprise. You may or may not ejaculate, but ejaculation is perfectly normal (and it's not urine).

10. If you don’t at first orgasm, try try again.

It can take several practice sessions before you notice any build up. Try varying your position, using a different toy, experimenting with breathing and kegel exercises (to strengthen your PC muscle), or having a partner help you. Because the g-spot is most responsive when aroused, you may also want to try stimulating it after you’ve had an orgasm.

11. Remember the ear lobe.

Experimenting with the g-spot can be fun, and you never know what you’ll learn in the process. But try not to get hung up on this being a mind-blowing experience. If you’re playing around and it’s not doing anything for you, try something else, and know that there is nothing wrong with you, and what turns us all on is incredibly individual and unique.

"Where is the G-Spot ..."

"Advanced Tips on Oral Sex"

"Are you suffering from painful intercourse?"

Women suffering from painful intercourse don’t feel comfortable to go for a consultation to the physician but face several reproductive problems in their life.

Pain during intercourse is the most sensitive problem amongst women that most of them feel it difficult to consult a physician. But this can be treated as the reason might be some physical illness.

Since a woman plays a major part of the whole reproduction process right beginning from the formation of the ova till giving birth to the child, painful intercourse could be a difficult stage for you to pass. In medical terms, it is known as dyspareunia that leads to tearing, ripping, burning or aching sensation during penetration. This pain could occur at the vaginal opening or deep in the pelvis or anywhere else in between. This could also be felt throughout the pelvic area and sexual organs.

Reasons for pain during intercourse:

1. The most common reason for the irritation during intercourse is insufficient lubrication or arousal that could create a vicious circle leading to a fear among the woman. Women having a hysterectomy or mastectomy can also face this problem with arousal because of the feeling of incompleteness. This could be treated with prompt and proper consultation whereby the physician provides you with lubrication methods that in turn will reduce discomfort.

2. Another factor for painful intercourse is thinning and drying of vaginal tissues when menopause begins amongst women. This occurs due to less production of the estrogen hormone that is needed to maintain vaginal tissue moist. As the ability of the vagina to make its own mucus tissues declines so as it becomes dry, itchy and painful leading to pain during intercourse.

3. Unintentional muscle spasms of the thighs, pelvis and vagina can also make penetration impossible and this stage is known as vaginismus that could develop from any of the above mentioned factors or due to psychological factors. A victim of traumatic sexual experience or rape can also lead to vaginismus and as such counseling can help a lot.

4. Most common reasons for painful intercourse is vaginal, pelvic infection or boils or cysts and boils, tumors, scars or anything that narrows the vagina, uterine tissue growing outside the uterus with bleeding and pain, intact hymen, complications of any past surgery, diseases such as diabetes that interfere with the physical process of arousal or orgasm.

Any of the factors due to less lubrication can be overcome with methods such as lubrication gels, estrogen creams or estrogen replacement therapy in pills.

"Full Body Orgasms"

Tantric philosophy has two seemingly different ideas about orgasm: the physical orgasm and the heart orgasm. At first appearance they may seem dualistic and contrary, but on closer inspection one supports the other perfectly.

On the one hand we are encouraged to be in our hearts 24 hours a day. That bliss-state can be equated to an orgasmic state of being with the energy transferred to all that we are and do during the day. In Tantra it is sometimes referred to as the "right hand path" because certain sects of practitioners achieve this optimum state of being through meditation, yoga, mantra chanting, and celibacy.

One the other hand, which is the "left hand path," sexuality is the vehicle in which one rides to achieve this same bliss-state. Sexuality is used as a form of yoga to go to the deepest spiritual levels one can attain. In other words, the orgasm is used as the gateway to recognize the bliss-state. The individual then has the proper tools to grow that recognition into a powerful path to consciousness.

Modern Tantra recognizes that there are several forms of orgasm. There is the clitoral orgasm, which tends to be very localized to the genitals. There is the vaginal orgasm, which mostly involves the G-spot and a few other locations in the vagina. There is the blended orgasm between the clitoris and the G-spot. This makes perfect sense because under the skin, the clitoris splits into two roots and these roots wrap around either side of the G-spot, which stimulates it directly. And there is the energy orgasm or heart orgasm.

Vaginal orgasms lend themselves to full body orgasmic potential when the breath, the mind and the orgasm itself all form a complete experience. When our bodies get this full-blown experience and when we practice enhancing it with different breath patterns, sounds and "right hand path" techniques, we have the potential to move into multiple orgasms and out-of-body sex. As we begin to go further into this practice one is able to begin to have full body orgasms, or energy orgasms, simply by breathing them, without any physical touch. This powerful energy is then much more available to us in our everyday life, sometimes by simply breathing!

When the two paths are blended the possibilities for personal growth extend exponentially and the dualism vanishes.

"Your First Night"

Of course, no one can teach you how to have sex. But a pre-marital chat on sex will take away a lot of anxiety that you feel. Here's what you can expect.

Men may advertise for virgin girls in their matrimonial ads, but when it comes to the bedroom, they expect you to be a seductress. Yeah, even on the first night. A contradiction, isn't it? As you will realise soon, marriages are a lot about finding balance within contradictions.

Pre-marital counselling:

Not very sought after in India even now, some psychological and clinical advice on sex can help save many a first night from being a passion pooper. Counselling teaches you that passion--an urgent product of desire--doesn't always develop on its own, it is often the hard-won fruit of intimate communication. Have you talked about your first night with your partner? If not, do so; it will help thaw a lot of apprehension. If possible, visit a counsellor and express all your reservations and queries.

The Honeymoon and The Hymen:

"Will I bleed?" "Will it be painful?" These are the most common questions, brides-to-be ask. Despite the fact that many of the urban couples these days have had some pre-marital sexual experience. And despite the fact that most of the educated people know that they hymen can rupture even due to strenuous sports, horse-riding etc, yet, the hymen remains a debatable issue with most couples, leading to much misunderstanding.

The answer to this is fairly simple. If your hymen is still unbroken, yes bleeding can occur (though it doesn't have to), and you may even experience a little pain the first time. But it doesn't last and is almost never anything serious.

Then there is the other area of general ignorance in connection with the hymen. In some cases, it does not even yield to sexual penetration, making intercourse an agonising encounter for the girl, and frustrating for the man. In such cases, the hymen has to be broken with a gynecologist's help. Sometimes a minor surgical procedure is required to make penetration possible, if there prevails a congenital malformation. But since very few couples know of this, it can make them distant and anxious in the initial days of marriage itself.

So whatever your personal experience, your strategy should be not to make a big deal about anything till you know what is causing the anxiety. Even men need to free themselves from the pressure to perform that can become a killing tension on the first night. If you make each other comfortable on the first night itself, good sex is sure to follow.

The Big O:

Since the female orgasm is not associated with ejaculation, many women (and men) develop crazy theories about it, often holding themselves responsible for anything that goes wrong. Chances are that a woman may not be able to achieve orgasm on the first night, because she has to first feel comfortable with her own body, with the intimacy that she develops with her groom, and it is a deep journey into personal uninhibition. It can't be rushed or dutifully fulfilled on the first night. So don't expect the earth or move or time to stand still on your wedding night. It is unrealistic for both of you.

Your libido, as Freud said, is the strongest thing about you. Treat it kindly. And it will stand by you.

Even if your husband is the understanding sort, with multiple expectations, vulnerability, redefinition of your personal space and all the things that marriage brings, the honeymoon can make you very jittery. Unless you are prepared for it.

"Sharing Each Other's Genitals"

Oral sex is both casual and rampant among young people today.

"Many engage in this activity rather cavalierly with friends, or even people they barely know," she writes. "Sharing each other's genitals has become like sharing a cigarette, drink or joint in some circles."

Such declarations are common in many new parenting guides that deal with teen sexuality.

They warn adults that their kids are engaged in new and risky behaviours that the parents never experienced in their own youth.

But are these necessary updates on modern sexuality or alarmist tactics that scare parents into thinking they should do more than just talk about the birds and the bees?

"For parents today, as opposed to 30 or 20 years ago, there is a new reality," said Cory Silverberg, a Toronto-based sex educator and co-owner of Come as You Are. "We are living in an increasingly sexualized culture and youth are exposed to way more sexual content."

The Internet, advertising and pop culture have all led to kids being faced with a swath of new issues, and they are approaching sexuality in a new way, dragging their parents along with them, like it or not.

"The parents aren't prepared for what's going on now," he said, suggesting that adults need to educate themselves about social networking, pop culture and other realities of teenage life that may have an impact on their attitude toward sexuality.