"SEX AND RELATION"

"Problems With Ejaculation"

2009-04-04T21:52:00.001-07:00

Ejaculation is an innate apex of a sexual act experienced by men. It is a medium of pleasure that all men look forward to and is the main objective of getting married as it is the vital demand of human instinct. There are various ways to achieve ejaculation that are learnt instinctively, and out of curiosity.

Nevertheless, everything is not as good as it seems. Sexual dysfunctions are getting very common nowadays. Basically, the increasing number of psychosocial, psychological, and physical dysfunctions are due to the metropolitan outspread and increasing pollution of planet earth.

Delayed ejaculation

Regardless of how we got to this point, let’s talk about a specific sexual dysfunction, commonly known as delayed ejaculation. The term delayed ejaculation refers to the inability to ejaculate and it is quite an untoward situation where a man is unable to ejaculate.

Psychological problems

One of the common forms of ejaculation is where a man is unable to ejaculate in the company of his partner. If a man is unable to ejaculate in the presence of his partner, but can ejaculate normally while alone after some sort of sexual stimulation, then the reason behind such a dysfunction is wholly solely psychological.

Men suffering from such a dysfunction usually have orthodox religious backgrounds and are generally taught that sex is a sin. One of the other reasons is that that a man is simply not attracted to his partner.

Sometimes a trauma or a traumatic situation can lead to this dysfunction as well. For example, if a man finds out that his partner is cheating on him and is having an affair with someone else or if he is being caught by his partner while having sex or masturbating, then these traumatizing situations can make him too distressed to attain ejaculation.

Sometimes, it does so happen that men are unable to ejaculate while masturbating, whereas they are leading a normal sex life. This sort of dysfunction is also due to some of the reasons that are explained above in detail.

Masturbation as a sin

Most of the religions consider masturbation as a big sin and the followers of such religions are taught to refrain from developing sinful habits like these.

So, in such a case, where your mind is distracted by religious teachings, it can be difficult for you to have an intimate feeling for your partner. You cannot force or wear a feeling on yourself. So, if you are suffering from such a problem, seek professional help immediately. Go to your physician to get a referral to a therapist that can help both you and your partner.

Basically, the therapist will explain about all the sexual stimulation and responses and will help you to understand your sexual needs. The therapist might recommend a treatment if necessary and can psychologically talk you out of such a situation.

Just relax

Ideally, you can stimulate yourself and your partner by just relaxing. Relaxation is the key to intimacy. Now, in order to be intimate, the best thing for you to do is to have a romantic candle light dinner, have some wine, and if both of you think that porn can stimulate you in a better manner, then go for it. Avoid unnecessary conversations that can lead to an argument. Just relax and try to have some fun by hugging and kissing each other and try not to hustle yourself into having sex. Remember, take your time and just relax.

It is very important for you to know that a muscle, known as pubococcygeus muscle should be under your control, as relaxing and tensing of this muscle is sometimes very helpful. In order to train your PC muscle, you should consider a Penis Health exercise program that has a series of healthy exercises.

"Types of Condoms and What Women Like About Them"

2009-04-04T21:49:00.000-07:00

It seems as if every time you turn around there is a new kind of condom on the market. There is a rainbow of color, a plethora of sizes and more flavors than you can count out there. The days of the one size fits all condom are long gone, never to return.

Textured condoms

Textures are one of the biggest selling points when it comes to these new fangled condoms. There are ribbed condoms for a more pleasurable experience for women as well as thinner (yet still durable) ones for men.

There are even studded condoms that are textured on the inside and the outside, this is great news for both men and women!

The sheer number of condom varieties is near impossible to count but it is important to note that while the brands may differ there are still basically eight different categories of condoms.

What are condoms made from?

The vast majority of condoms are made with either polyurethane or latex.

The size of the condoms you purchase is also an important consideration. And this category is not just about length but width as well, so keep that in mind when you are shopping for condoms.

Many men will find that they need to shop at specialty shops for condoms that fit them well because most drugstores sell only standard sizes. There is nothing worse than a condom that doesn’t fit well.

Lubrication is another important factor to consider. If you have any specific allergies then you will want to read the labels carefully since not all of them are made with the same ingredients.

A good condom

Now what are the qualities of a good condom, for material, latex is probably the best; avoid the naturally made ones such as lamb membrane. Some individuals claim that STD’s can go through latex but this is untrue.

When picking a lubricant the water-based ones are the best like those that are already pre-lubricated with spermicidal gel or foam. Petroleum, baby oil’s or cream should not be used as a lubricant as they can tend to weaken the condom, even the latex ones.

What do women want?

Specifically, what condom would a woman want? French ticklers (condoms with long appendages) or those with ridges can increase pleasure during intercourse. For the same purpose a woman may insist on the ultra thin type of condom.

Lastly, and maybe the most interesting fact is that women generally do not care about all the fancy ridges, ribs or the lubricant.

The problem found is that condoms are generally designed by men, for men. A study has shown that if women were to design a condom they would just make it padded, as although the length may not be critical, according to her, the width does.

"Health Benefits of the Male Orgasm"

2009-04-04T21:46:00.000-07:00

We all understand the power of sex. It’s more than just a reproductive function of human beings, its something we derive pleasure from. It’s a pleasure which most people find incomparable to any other feeling on earth-even love.

We are influenced constantly by sex in our daily lives, the media knows this and it’s evident by the sexual undertones in everything marketed to us from perfumes to cell phones.

The orgasm

Sex wouldn’t be sex if not for the orgasm. The ultimate goal of every form of sexual activity is to arrive at this one explosive moment that is the peak of all sexual pleasure.

The pleasure of a particular sex session is easily quantified by the nature of the orgasm derived from it.

With function of the orgasm seemingly related to sexual pleasure alone, few people know of the health benefits that are associated with the orgasms we experience during sex. Recent health studies have showed a strong link with orgasms and the general health and well being of the male body.

The health benefits

One individual , Dr Alfred Kinsey started out with research in the 1950’s to try and understand what other functions and benefits humans could derive from sex other than reproduction and pleasure. One outcome of Dr Kinsey’s study was the discovery that people who engaged in more sex and had frequent orgasm were less prone to stress and violent tendencies.

Later studies revealed other amazing discoveries. These discoveries included the fact that people who engaged in frequent sexual activity and had orgasms had a lower mortality rate when compared with their less sexually active counterparts. (Duke University, 1970s and Caerphilly, 1997). For women an active sex life also bears some correlation with a lower risk of heart disease (Psychosomatic Medicine, 1976).

Other individuals and researchers such as Dudley Chapman a Gyaenacologist have since made other discoveries showing that an active sex life helps the body combat infections and disease better.

Reducing cancer

In men, frequent ejaculation induced by orgasms has been found to reduce the liability of the male body to develop prostrate cancer. This discovery was as a result of work carried out by researchers in Melbourne, Australia. Other benefits such as a reduction in the risk of pain during urination on the attainment of old age have also been noted among researchers in other fields.

Clearly these results from researchers show that human beings were meant to have sex, enjoy it and stay healthy from it. Lack of a healthy sex life and corresponding healthy orgasms affects the body in a negative way, in order to counter these problems an active sexual life and healthy orgasms are needed.

"Sensual Massage"

2009-04-04T21:44:00.000-07:00

It is very important for your lover to know that you are crazy about her and love her with all your heart and soul.

Make her feel special

To make her feel special, take her out to somewhere romantic or surprise her by arranging a candle light dinner at home. After dinner, just tell her how beautiful she is and tell her that you want to give her a massage.

Don’t fool her by saying her that you want to massage her and just rush her into sexual activities. Try to take one step at a time.

Relax and have fun

At this point, forget about all your worries and just concentrate on having a great time and making her feel the ecstasy of your love.

A romantic song can make your work a lot easier, so one or two CDs of cool romantic songs may come in handy.

Now, the other things that you require are a few scented candles, scented or unscented massage oil, a few clean towels, and a clean sheet underneath to prevent everything else from getting oil stains.

The perfect massage

Start massaging her shoulders in a gentle manner in a clockwise motion in order to make her feel relaxed.

While massaging her shoulders give her a kiss or two at the back of her neck and tease her by stimulating some of her erogenous areas, but don’t touch the breasts or the vagina yet. Just slowly rub your body against hers and don’t leave out any part of the body.

When you are at the final of the massage and you are massaging the most erogenous zones, just keep your pace and don’t start massaging her hastily. While massaging, make sure that she is enjoying it throughout and if at any point you observe or feel that she is becoming uncomfortable, just pamper her a bit and give her a while to breathe.

Before starting the massage of the most sensitive parts, ask her if she wants you to massage these areas or not. If she wants you to go on, then start massaging her outer lips gently and then go on massaging the clitoris and the G-spot. If she is comfortable with the use of sex toys and you are comfortable with using them too, then you can massage her with a vibrator as well.

"Erotic Massage"

2009-04-04T21:42:00.000-07:00

Erotic massage is the best way to get a sturdy orgasm and you will feel all refreshed and calm. A sexual state for a greater extent is attained and maintained with the help of erotic massages. Erotic massages are very beneficial for men suffering from premature ejaculation, as these massages can turn them on without ejaculation.

Getting in the mood

Some people massage erotically to enhance the mood. If you have romantic and stimulating CDs, they will help you a lot as well with the combination of a scented oil massage to relax the nerves of your lover.

As you know, you should not rush to massage the genitals. Massage her body all over, knead her stomach gently, massage her pelvic muscles to make her feel relaxed and by you touching her sensually will turn her on and this turned on state will be maintained for quite a while.

Bite her ear gently and tell her that you love her body and she is the hottest woman you have ever seen.

Now, when she is totally into you, go ahead and massage the most tender spots of her body. Go slowly, let her feel your love, as the more gentle you are, the more pleasure you will give and receive.

"Erogenous Zones: Stimulation Techniques"

2009-04-04T21:38:00.000-07:00

Here you will be learning different techniques of stimulating the female erogenous zones.

If you want to become a successful lover you should know how to please a woman and make her feel satisfied. By reading further, you will be able to learn as to what works and why, and how can you create and discover new techniques if need be.

Men and women are different

Most of the people, either men or women think that they and their partner have same sexual interests.

Men almost have the same interest in getting touched the same way over and over again. But women are a bit different as they are not ready to be touched all the time and basically like to be turned on properly before moving onto the main action.

So, what you need to do is to get your partner in a playful mood and turn her on by doing all the techniques we taught you before.

After having a romantic dinner, just check out if your lady wants to go into the foreplay mode or not. Mostly men thinks that it is boring and rush into having sex, but it is only in your best interest to enjoy the foreplay mode as women love it. Foreplay is basically when you are exploring and building up the passion for having a great time with your partner.

Learn how to judge different situations

Judging different situations is what we can’t teach you and you have to learn to self-judge some situations. Let me give you an example: As you know almost all women like to be kissed and loved, but you have to show her, your true passion and love.

Do not focus mainly on the body of women, respect them, listen to them, try to understand them, talk to them, and let them know that you love them individually not just their bodies.

Don’t create a feeling of awkwardness, for example if you are kissing her and she is not responding, stop right at that moment and ask her as to how she is feeling, show her that you really care about her.

If at sometime she tells you to stop kissing or stop doing whatever you are doing at that moment to her, go ahead and stop right at that moment and try to talk to her, try to share her problems and make her feel good.

Body signs

Reading the body signs is one of the skill that you should master. She will guide you to treat her the way she wants you to in her own way, try to read her body language and let her guide you to give her the best experience ever.

So, to sum it up, read as much as you can, absorb all the information and try to experiment it. Don’t push her to do anything, but be a bit firm, don’t let her feel that you are controlling her, but be in control, listen to her, be gentle, and let her know and feel that you are not going to harm her in anyway and you are enjoying as much being with her as she is being with you.

"Erogenous Zones: How to Find Them"

2009-04-04T20:46:00.004-07:00

If you want to be a perfect lover, you have to be curious and you should strive to learn to be the best in giving pleasure to your lady. Along with these skills you should be keen enough to explore and attain more knowledge.

As we all know that internet has given us the access to zillions of porn sites, but sadly most men are not able to discover every nook and corner of a vagina yet. All they see is some pink flesh covered in hair. It is almost impossible for some men to find the clitoris and are not learned enough when it comes to the erogenous areas of a female body.

Feeling shy?

It is quite surprising to know that some men are quite shy and feel lucky if they are able to get in bed with some woman and just don’t explore the body of their partner to the fullest and just can’t experiment anything.

Some men are not shy, but are not into experimenting or exploring and they have a valid reason. And the reason is that that what if their partner feels weird about them and can tell them â€œback off you wacko. So, men with a sense of control can handle situations like this a lot more easier than a shy person.

Looking after yourself

A good look matters. Even today some men think that looking good does not matter at all. Well, it’s their point of view and we respect it even though it is wrong to some extent.

You do not have to be stunningly beautiful, but you can look good by wearing clean clothes and taking care of your hygiene.

Turn your partner on through masturbation

Masturbation is the key to turn on your lady. If you and your partner are in a mood to have a best night time ever, you should start conversing about masturbation.

If your partner is a shy person and does not share her intimate secrets with you, try to talk her out of it and tell her to masturbate.

She might be stimulating her clitoris in order to masturbate and you will be able to have a good look as to what she is doing and how she is doing it.

Be gentle while conversing and don’t spill all your emotions on her and give her some space. If masturbation does not interest her or she is shy to share this little detail with you, don’t push her to do so.

What are the main erogenous zones?

The main erogenous areas are the clitoris and the perineum, but these areas cannot be easily accessed.

The clitoris is one of the most sensitive spots and is responsible for orgasms and for your information the only job that clitoris does is of giving pleasure. Orgasms that are more common in women are clitoris orgasm.

To pull it off, you should ask your partner to show you the intimate parts of her body and if you are lucky she might consider your request.

Try to explore your partner

If you are the one in control and your lady allows you to explore around, then you should exactly know the locations of the erogenous areas.

For example: Clitoris is sited above the intersection of the two inner lips, biologically known as labia minora.

You have to use your fingers delicately to separate out these lips and make sure that your nails are properly clipped. Now, the hood, commonly known as the rosebud will be visible.

Basically, the clitoris is covered partially or fully by a hood and this differs from one woman to another. You have to be very gentle when using your fingers or lips on the clitoris. If the sensation is overwhelming for your partner, then give her a while to recuperate.

The second most sensitive erogenous zone is the perineum and you must learn to stimulate it on your own. It is sited between the lower intersection of the labia minora and the anus.

It is a very sensitive area and can be stimulated in various ways to give pleasure. Even men like their perineum to be pressed while ejaculating. The perineum basically enhances the pleasure and can make your partner beg for more.

"Erogenous Zones: How to Find Them

2009-04-04T20:46:00.003-07:00

"Erogenous Zones: How to Find Them

2009-04-04T20:46:00.002-07:00

"Erogenous Zones: How to Find Them

2009-04-04T20:46:00.001-07:00

"Erogenous Zones: How to Find Them

2009-04-04T20:46:00.000-07:00

"Top Things Women Hate About Men"

2009-04-04T20:38:00.000-07:00

The relationship between men and women has always been a love-hate type. This article will describe what a woman finds most annoying in her partner. Though this is a much debated topic, we know for sure that a woman never likes a man who is weak or shows too much of interest in her initially. Similarly there are many points that psychologists have tried to analyze. It would be very easy to put it down in a few simple points, but perhaps it is best to debate this topic by asking questions. How would you feel if you see your man with another woman enjoying a cup of coffee at the coffee shop around the street corner? Chances are, you would feel a sense of jealousy, even if the woman is just an office colleague who just wanted to feel a little relaxed. This is just an example and hundreds more can be cited. Any relationship can survive just on one sentence Trust me and I will never let you down. If you really mean it, this can be the foundation of any statement.

Many Psychoanalysts often point out that women often contradict themselves while expressing what they desire and do not desire in men. Though women publicly admit that they like men who are strong, secretly they like a man on whom she can wield certain amount of power. Well for all the men reading this article, the Billy Joel song She is always a woman for me is how we would love to define her. No matter what, men will always enjoy the company of women. Let me now bring out certain points which women definitely find annoying in a man. Imagine your boyfriend calling you up every 15 minutes, when you are in the middle of a busy road. Regardless of how much you love your partner, this can become very irritating, as you would feel you are free to be on your own, due to the constant phone calls.

Now imagine you are on a first date and he starts talking about the amount of money that he has made in the stock markets or the new Ferrari that he has bought. I am sure more often than not a woman would not like to hear about these things on the first date. While do talk about what they do for a living on first dates, it is usually considered annoying and ruse for someone to brag about their earnings.

It is also likely (majority of the times) that a woman would not like a person who would show insensitivity towards her feelings. This is a mistake that many men make and women do not like this attitude from them. There are many other factors that women generally do not like in men such as arrogance, lies, submissive behavior, etc. Never ever show a woman that you have a weak character. This is one of the traits that women dislike in a man. It is a mistake that many men make by making a woman feel that he is ready to fall at her feet. Contrary to a man's thinking that a woman would appreciate it, women get annoyed with men who are too submissive and ready to do anything for her. This does not mean that a woman does not want a sensitive man who is open about his feelings, but it does mean that a woman still wants a man to be his own person, think for himself and claim what he wants from a relationship.

A woman's relationship with a man is very delicate and she looks for a strong shoulder to rest her head. A woman always likes a man who has a big heart and ready to share and care. A self-centered man is rarely loved by women and more often than not will crave for female company. You are setting yourself up for failure, if you show undue interest in other women when you are with a woman. This is a behavior that women dislike and will definitely put her off. Manipulative attitude is something that women dislike in a man. Hence, try to be as open in your behavior as possible and at the same time do not fall prey if she displays manipulative behavior. Keeping these points in mind, you can win over a woman. Remember that love blossoms slowly and you need to give your woman time and space if you really want to win her over. We have tried to explore few points that make a woman annoyed with a man. There may be many more and hence it is always advisable that you always be yourself when you are on your initial dates.

"Stimulate The Breasts"

2009-04-03T21:48:00.000-07:00

But you have to be aware of the fact that each and every girl is different in all respects. You cannot stimulate or seduce every girl the same way. There are some girls who want their man to fondle their breasts, but they don’t like it when it comes to stimulating their tits. So, try to be creative and think or even ask her directly if she would like you to do something or not.

Well, I don’t have to tell you that tits are of various shapes and sizes and so are boobs.

If you have small breasts and you are thinking that you cannot attract any man, then you are totally wrong, as some men love girls with small breasts and some men like huge breasts, so you are going to get all the male attention.

Scientists have done studies and they have found that girls with big tits have more fun while having sex, but their tits are not that much sensitive to touch.

Girls with small sized tits enjoy the sensation that can make them go crazy as their perky little tits are very much sensitive to touch.

So, it is pretty evident that when you will nibble a small tit, you are turning your girl really horny, but a girl with bigger tits won’t get turned on to that extent if you will stimulate her tits.

Breasts And Pleasure

The brown place on the boobs is called the areola and it is very sensitive to touch and the bigger the brown nipple surface area, the more pleasure you can give to your girl.

The areola or the brown area has a lot of nerve endings and sometimes the sensations on stimulation can be overwhelming, and she can reach her climax just by stimulating her nipple area.

Some girls do have inverted nipples, but don’t worry girls, you can get as much fun as any other ordinary girl with big or small tits.

Be Firm, But Not Too Rough

Now, a little piece of advice for men who love to give special attention to the boobs, be firm in your approach, when you are sucking and fondling, but be gentle.

Don’t be too aggressive to give a bruise to your girl, as she won’t like it and it can also cause some serious health problems to her.

While biting on the nipples try to avoid to tear or break-in the skin and don’t even think of using the nipple clippers.

While squeezing the boobs, make sure that you are not squeezing them like a ball, think that you are squeezing a balloon filled with water, you know what I mean right. Treat her like she is special to you and tell her that you cannot think of hurting her in anyway and she will be all over you and will allow you to be all over her.

Use Your Tongue

Some naughty experts say that if a woman has big boobs, the best way to tease and please her is to make her lay on her back and start tantalizing the area outside the breasts below the armpits.

Feel free to use your tongue and fingertips in a gentle flicking rhythm and nibble a bit as you are working on her boobs. Well, you are one lucky girl if your boy is paying too much attention to you and is doing everything to please you.

Be Creative

You cannot use the same technique every time. You have to be creative in inventing places to please your woman and make her moan for more.

If you are in a relationship with a woman who has an infant child and she is breastfeeding her, then be as gentle as possible, as her baby has given her enough sucking for the day. So, just drop the idea of sucking her boobs for a while and if she wants you to fondle her breasts, then concentrate on the underneath part.

"JUST A BIT OF FUN"

2009-03-21T17:29:00.000-07:00

Great Sex: Finding Your G-Spot

The debate over the g-spot seems to never end. Does it exist, is it important, should it be talked about, does it have any usefulness? Definitive answers are rare, so while the experts debate, why not do your own research, and get to the heart (or would it be gheart) of the matter. Many women can stimulate their g-spot using their fingers. Some people will find it easier using a toy that is curved, either a dildo or a vibrator.

Difficulty: N/A

Time Required: You might find your g-spot immediately, or it could take several attempts. Don't pressure yourself.

1. Avoid performance pressure about the "magic spot".

People can become fixated on achieving a sexual goal (multiple orgasms, simultaneous orgasm, g-spot orgasms) One thing I can promise is that this is the best way to NOT enjoy any sort of sexual encounter. Remember that sexual exploration is mostly about the journey, not the destination (although the destination is better than most, I’ll agree). Try not to make this another notch in your “sexually self-actualized” belt.

2. Turn yourself on.

Any homework that starts with this is bound to be somewhat fruitful. The spongy area around the g-spot gets engorged with blood when you’re sexually aroused, so it is much easier to find and feel when you’re turned on.

3. Get comfortable and find the g-spot area.

Lie on your back, squat, or lie on your stomach. Place your palm face down on your vulva and slowly insert a finger inside your vagina (use lube if you’re feeling a little dry), crooking it forward in a “come hither” motion. When you’re up to about the second knuckle you should feel a slightly bumpy or ridged area on the upper wall of your vagina.

4. Notice how the g-spot feels.

The texture of the g-spot area will likely be noticeably different from the typically smooth walls of the vagina. When you’re aroused it can expand, so feel it at different times during your arousal to get familiar with its contours and sensitivity. The g-spot responds to pressure, so press down and pull forward using that "come hither" motion with your fingers.

5. Explore the g-spot with toys.

For some it can be awkward to stimulate the g-spot by hand. A g-spot vibrator or dildo can be a great helper in this. Apply a little lube to your toy, and insert it with the tip (if it’s curved) pointing up toward the top wall of your vagina. Work it in slowly, far enough (a couple of inches) so the tip is pressing against your g-spot.

6. Experiment with pressure and motion.

Some women will find pressure against the g-spot pleasurable, some women like the feeling vibration when a toy is pressing against the g-spot. Experiment and see if either feels good for you. For most women, the g-spot responds to firm pressure. In the beginning, use your toy as if you were trying to scratch an itch—don’t pull the toy all the way out, but use short strokes, applying firm pressure, against the g-spot.

7. Vary the movements.

A circular or back-and-forth motion may be necessary to get you started, but you might soon graduate to a more vigorous thrusting. If you’ve got a vibrator, try playing with the vibrations both on and off to see which you like better.

8. Add clitoral stimulation to g-spot play.

You’ll know you’re hitting the spot as you feel tingly sensations, the urge to pee, and an overall elevation in your arousal. When you feel the urge to come, stimulate your clitoris using your favorite method. Keep stroking your g-spot.

9. Let go.

With continued stimulation, you’ll eventually feel a sensation much like having to pee. This can be quite disconcerting at first, and has probably led plenty of women to abandon the process, but if you stick with it you’ll be in for a pleasant surprise. You may or may not ejaculate, but ejaculation is perfectly normal (and it's not urine).

10. If you don’t at first orgasm, try try again.

It can take several practice sessions before you notice any build up. Try varying your position, using a different toy, experimenting with breathing and kegel exercises (to strengthen your PC muscle), or having a partner help you. Because the g-spot is most responsive when aroused, you may also want to try stimulating it after you’ve had an orgasm.

11. Remember the ear lobe.

Experimenting with the g-spot can be fun, and you never know what you’ll learn in the process. But try not to get hung up on this being a mind-blowing experience. If you’re playing around and it’s not doing anything for you, try something else, and know that there is nothing wrong with you, and what turns us all on is incredibly individual and unique.

"Where is the G-Spot ..."

2009-03-21T07:10:00.000-07:00

"Advanced Tips on Oral Sex"

2009-03-21T06:20:00.000-07:00

"Are you suffering from painful intercourse?"

2009-03-21T05:50:00.001-07:00

Women suffering from painful intercourse don’t feel comfortable to go for a consultation to the physician but face several reproductive problems in their life.

Pain during intercourse is the most sensitive problem amongst women that most of them feel it difficult to consult a physician. But this can be treated as the reason might be some physical illness.

Since a woman plays a major part of the whole reproduction process right beginning from the formation of the ova till giving birth to the child, painful intercourse could be a difficult stage for you to pass. In medical terms, it is known as dyspareunia that leads to tearing, ripping, burning or aching sensation during penetration. This pain could occur at the vaginal opening or deep in the pelvis or anywhere else in between. This could also be felt throughout the pelvic area and sexual organs.

Reasons for pain during intercourse:

1. The most common reason for the irritation during intercourse is insufficient lubrication or arousal that could create a vicious circle leading to a fear among the woman. Women having a hysterectomy or mastectomy can also face this problem with arousal because of the feeling of incompleteness. This could be treated with prompt and proper consultation whereby the physician provides you with lubrication methods that in turn will reduce discomfort.

2. Another factor for painful intercourse is thinning and drying of vaginal tissues when menopause begins amongst women. This occurs due to less production of the estrogen hormone that is needed to maintain vaginal tissue moist. As the ability of the vagina to make its own mucus tissues declines so as it becomes dry, itchy and painful leading to pain during intercourse.

3. Unintentional muscle spasms of the thighs, pelvis and vagina can also make penetration impossible and this stage is known as vaginismus that could develop from any of the above mentioned factors or due to psychological factors. A victim of traumatic sexual experience or rape can also lead to vaginismus and as such counseling can help a lot.

4. Most common reasons for painful intercourse is vaginal, pelvic infection or boils or cysts and boils, tumors, scars or anything that narrows the vagina, uterine tissue growing outside the uterus with bleeding and pain, intact hymen, complications of any past surgery, diseases such as diabetes that interfere with the physical process of arousal or orgasm.

Any of the factors due to less lubrication can be overcome with methods such as lubrication gels, estrogen creams or estrogen replacement therapy in pills.

"Full Body Orgasms"

2009-03-15T02:47:00.000-07:00

Tantric philosophy has two seemingly different ideas about orgasm: the physical orgasm and the heart orgasm. At first appearance they may seem dualistic and contrary, but on closer inspection one supports the other perfectly.

On the one hand we are encouraged to be in our hearts 24 hours a day. That bliss-state can be equated to an orgasmic state of being with the energy transferred to all that we are and do during the day. In Tantra it is sometimes referred to as the "right hand path" because certain sects of practitioners achieve this optimum state of being through meditation, yoga, mantra chanting, and celibacy.

One the other hand, which is the "left hand path," sexuality is the vehicle in which one rides to achieve this same bliss-state. Sexuality is used as a form of yoga to go to the deepest spiritual levels one can attain. In other words, the orgasm is used as the gateway to recognize the bliss-state. The individual then has the proper tools to grow that recognition into a powerful path to consciousness.

Modern Tantra recognizes that there are several forms of orgasm. There is the clitoral orgasm, which tends to be very localized to the genitals. There is the vaginal orgasm, which mostly involves the G-spot and a few other locations in the vagina. There is the blended orgasm between the clitoris and the G-spot. This makes perfect sense because under the skin, the clitoris splits into two roots and these roots wrap around either side of the G-spot, which stimulates it directly. And there is the energy orgasm or heart orgasm.

Vaginal orgasms lend themselves to full body orgasmic potential when the breath, the mind and the orgasm itself all form a complete experience. When our bodies get this full-blown experience and when we practice enhancing it with different breath patterns, sounds and "right hand path" techniques, we have the potential to move into multiple orgasms and out-of-body sex. As we begin to go further into this practice one is able to begin to have full body orgasms, or energy orgasms, simply by breathing them, without any physical touch. This powerful energy is then much more available to us in our everyday life, sometimes by simply breathing!

When the two paths are blended the possibilities for personal growth extend exponentially and the dualism vanishes.

"Your First Night"

2009-03-15T02:38:00.000-07:00

Of course, no one can teach you how to have sex. But a pre-marital chat on sex will take away a lot of anxiety that you feel. Here's what you can expect.

Men may advertise for virgin girls in their matrimonial ads, but when it comes to the bedroom, they expect you to be a seductress. Yeah, even on the first night. A contradiction, isn't it? As you will realise soon, marriages are a lot about finding balance within contradictions.

Pre-marital counselling:

Not very sought after in India even now, some psychological and clinical advice on sex can help save many a first night from being a passion pooper. Counselling teaches you that passion--an urgent product of desire--doesn't always develop on its own, it is often the hard-won fruit of intimate communication. Have you talked about your first night with your partner? If not, do so; it will help thaw a lot of apprehension. If possible, visit a counsellor and express all your reservations and queries.

The Honeymoon and The Hymen:

"Will I bleed?" "Will it be painful?" These are the most common questions, brides-to-be ask. Despite the fact that many of the urban couples these days have had some pre-marital sexual experience. And despite the fact that most of the educated people know that they hymen can rupture even due to strenuous sports, horse-riding etc, yet, the hymen remains a debatable issue with most couples, leading to much misunderstanding.

The answer to this is fairly simple. If your hymen is still unbroken, yes bleeding can occur (though it doesn't have to), and you may even experience a little pain the first time. But it doesn't last and is almost never anything serious.

Then there is the other area of general ignorance in connection with the hymen. In some cases, it does not even yield to sexual penetration, making intercourse an agonising encounter for the girl, and frustrating for the man. In such cases, the hymen has to be broken with a gynecologist's help. Sometimes a minor surgical procedure is required to make penetration possible, if there prevails a congenital malformation. But since very few couples know of this, it can make them distant and anxious in the initial days of marriage itself.

So whatever your personal experience, your strategy should be not to make a big deal about anything till you know what is causing the anxiety. Even men need to free themselves from the pressure to perform that can become a killing tension on the first night. If you make each other comfortable on the first night itself, good sex is sure to follow.

The Big O:

Since the female orgasm is not associated with ejaculation, many women (and men) develop crazy theories about it, often holding themselves responsible for anything that goes wrong. Chances are that a woman may not be able to achieve orgasm on the first night, because she has to first feel comfortable with her own body, with the intimacy that she develops with her groom, and it is a deep journey into personal uninhibition. It can't be rushed or dutifully fulfilled on the first night. So don't expect the earth or move or time to stand still on your wedding night. It is unrealistic for both of you.

Your libido, as Freud said, is the strongest thing about you. Treat it kindly. And it will stand by you.

Even if your husband is the understanding sort, with multiple expectations, vulnerability, redefinition of your personal space and all the things that marriage brings, the honeymoon can make you very jittery. Unless you are prepared for it.

"Sharing Each Other's Genitals"

2009-03-13T01:51:00.000-07:00

Oral sex is both casual and rampant among young people today.

"Many engage in this activity rather cavalierly with friends, or even people they barely know," she writes. "Sharing each other's genitals has become like sharing a cigarette, drink or joint in some circles."

Such declarations are common in many new parenting guides that deal with teen sexuality.

They warn adults that their kids are engaged in new and risky behaviours that the parents never experienced in their own youth.

But are these necessary updates on modern sexuality or alarmist tactics that scare parents into thinking they should do more than just talk about the birds and the bees?

"For parents today, as opposed to 30 or 20 years ago, there is a new reality," said Cory Silverberg, a Toronto-based sex educator and co-owner of Come as You Are. "We are living in an increasingly sexualized culture and youth are exposed to way more sexual content."

The Internet, advertising and pop culture have all led to kids being faced with a swath of new issues, and they are approaching sexuality in a new way, dragging their parents along with them, like it or not.

"The parents aren't prepared for what's going on now," he said, suggesting that adults need to educate themselves about social networking, pop culture and other realities of teenage life that may have an impact on their attitude toward sexuality.

"Cunnilingus: A Sexual Art Form"

2009-03-13T01:50:00.000-07:00

Oral sex with your girlfriend is probably one of the most erotic and fulfilling experiences when it comes to sex. The best advice I can give is to relax, take your time. It's all about sexual expression and pleasure.

The act of Cunnilingus is basically the manipulation of the lips and inner folds of the vagina and the stimulation of the clitoris..

This of course doesn't stop the inventive man from feeling his partner's body up. She has inner thighs, breasts and nipples that are just aching to be gently pinched and pulled while tongue and lips massage her intimate spots.

Place your hand underneath her in bed (or wherever you may be laying down!), slip her onto your fingers and let her do the work.

Let her move in the way she wants to move to pleasure herself, in a sense she is fucking your hand.

You may position your fingers onto her clit slightly harder at times to help her out a little but she will press and move harder as and when she wants to

Trust me! When she comes it will be explosive!

"Self-Conscious Sex Is Bad for You"

2009-03-13T01:42:00.000-07:00

It seems that women with hypoactive sexual desire - which is a disorder characterized by a continual lack of sexual interest or fantasies - use more brainpower than sexually healthy women in monitoring their reactions and performance during sex.

Don't Think about What You're Doing...Just Do It

It's a vicious circle: Women who pay too much attention to their performance during sex could be inhibiting sexual desire — and that lack of desire increases self-consciousness.

The idea's not new, of course, but now it's got scientific data to back it up. A new study by the Stanford University School of Medicine suggests that women with hypoactive sexual desire [HSDD] - which is a disorder characterized by a continual lack of sexual interest or fantasies - use more brainpower than sexually healthy women in monitoring their reactions and performance during sex.

Researchers used functional magnetic resonance imaging to track brain response to sexual stimuli in 16 HSDD women and 20 women who don't suffer the condition.

Participants were shown clips of erotic films, women's sporting events, and relaxing nature scenes. In addition to the brain scans, the women subjectively rated their levels of arousal while an instrument objectively measured vaginal response.

Their brains lit up in very different ways.

"Many of the HSDD subjects spent their time monitoring their experience, or lack thereof," said Leah Millheiser, one of the lead researchers of the study, which was published in the journal Neuroscience.

"For example, they may have been asking themselves, 'Am I responding correctly?', 'Is this how I am supposed to be feeling?', 'Should I be experiencing more arousal than I currently am?', instead of actually allowing themselves to integrate the information being presented to them in the erotic video."

These women, Millheiser says, may be cheating themselves out of the ability to associate positive emotional memories with sex.

In addition, the results pointed to a disconnect between both groups' subjective ratings and the arousal measurements taken by the vaginal instrument — results that are consistent with those found in other studies.

"Women can experience little subjective arousal, but still have a genital response, meaning vaginal engorgement and lubrication," Millheiser said.

"The reason behind this phenomenon is not well understood. There is a popular theory that women could have developed this response during the evolutionary process to protect the pelvic floor during forced sexual acts for procreation or childbirth."

The study suggests a useful strategy:

"As a female sexual medicine practitioner, I encourage women to 'be in the moment,'" Millheiser said. "That means to focus on the pleasure they are experiencing either by themselves or with their partner.

What I discourage is for women to focus on what they 'think' they should be experiencing. If certain expectations are not met during a sexual situation, this may lead to a negative sexual experience."

"Circumcision Lessens Sexual Pleasure For Men"

2009-03-13T01:28:00.000-07:00

In the ninth episode of the second season of "Sex and the City," one young male professional has had enough of being judged - and in some cases, rejected - by women because of his uncircumcised penis, and chooses to undergo circumcision as an adult.

The Foreskin Is a Vital Element in Sexual Intercourse

The foreskin consists of several parts, and performs several key functions in sexual activity and in the penis itself.

The foreskin can be thought of as akin to the eyelids, according to a presentation done by The University of Washington Health Sciences Academic Services & Facilities and George C. Denniston, MD.

The eyes need constant moisture to optimize their function, as well as a covering membrane capable of shielding them from pathogens and unwanted external irritants. The same holds true for the glans of the penis.

As erection occurs, the prepuce turns inside out, unfolding onto the shaft of the penis. During sexual intercourse, the foreskin will continuously retract and then recover over the glans, sliding along the sides of the vaginal wall in the process.

This causes increased stimulation to both male and female, as the penis is essentially sliding in and out of both itself and the vagina, using the prepuce as a sort of “buffer” between the two.

The foreskin, therefore, plays a very important role during sex, keeping both organs moist. Without it, the mushroom shaped glans actually draws moisture from the vagina with each forward and backward motion, increasing abrasion.

To Cut, or Not to Cut? A Touchy Subject

The importance of this question arises for different people in a variety of situations.

Women might have inherited certain beliefs about what men 'ought' to look like, and those beliefs stand to influence their feelings about future possible male sex partners. Men who are uncircumcised have to grapple with being members of an aesthetic minority.

In the ninth episode of the second season of "Sex and the City," one young male professional has had enough of being judged - and in some cases, rejected - by women because of his uncircumcised penis. He chooses to undergo circumcision as an adult, not out of religious considerations at all, but so that he can be more confident during his future sexual encounters.

Sure, many uncircumcised men might experience neither rejection nor 'judgment' from their significant others; but when our culture projects a certain image of physical normalcy that is significantly distinguished from the images we have of ourselves, conflict is likely to ensue.

At www.circumcision.org, it is stated that, "Circumcision is 'normal' among Americans. Normality is associated with cultural values. What is familiar becomes a cultural value. Circumcision is familiar."

It is noted that that our language reinforces what we believe is 'normal'. "For example, the term 'uncircumcised' suggests that to be circumcised is the norm, the standard."

Both men and women who are thinking about starting a family are vulnerable to the need to scrutinize the question of whether or not they genuinely 'agree' with circumcision; and certainly once one is told that "It's a boy" the debate of male circumcision will present itself sooner or later.

So, why are male babies circumcised? There are many reasons for the procedure, some of which are religious, while others are health-related.

None of the reasons for circumcising male babies is based on facts alone; rather, arguments are primarily supported by beliefs and theories about spirituality and/or health. Let's consider some of the most prominent arguments regarding male circumcision:

Pro: Circumcised penises are easier to clean/less likely to become infected/safer from disease. Many elements of this claim seem to be true, but to a nearly insignificant extent. At Kids Health, it is noted that, yes, baby boys who are uncircumcised are ten times more likely to develop urinary tract infections (during the first year of life).

The article goes on to claim that, "However, even with this increased risk of UTI, only one percent or less of uncircumcised males will be affected."

Irritation, inflammation (Balantis), and infection do occur more frequently among uncircumcised men; furthermore, it is easier to clean a circumcised penis (although after the foreskin becomes retractable - around age 5 - any incontestable impediments to self-cleaning are generally alleviated).

Finally, some claim that circumcised males are safer from developing penile cancer, but the margin of difference is extremely slim - and statistically 'insignificant' - because penile cancer itself is extremely rare, in both circumcised and uncircumcised males.

Con: The trauma of undergoing circumcision undermines the long-term emotional and psychological health of males.

There has been lots of research that supports the claim that the physical trauma of circumcision leaves a negative impact on psychological health.

Dr. Ronald Goldman - Executive Director of the Circumcision Resource Center in Boston, MA - has written a book entitled "Circumcision: The Hidden Trauma," in which he shows that, "circumcision has potential effects not only on men and sexuality, but also on mother-child relationships, male-female relationships and societal traits and problems."

Pro: Circumcised men are less likely to develop STDs.

"Some sexually transmitted diseases appear more common in uncircumcised men, others in circumcised men," said Dr. Goldman.

While circumcised men might be more vulnerable to certain STDs - Chlamydia and genital warts in particular - they might have some protection from the most fatal of them all: the human immunodeficiency virus.

Many doctors and researchers have produced evidence that suggests that circumcised men are less likely to contract HIV than men who are uncircumcised.

However, the Cochrane Collaboration has reviewed all the current evidence regarding circumcision and the contraction of HIV and has, "concluded that that there is insufficient evidence to support the idea that circumcised men have less chance of contracting HIV."

Con: Having foreskin allows men to more fully enjoy sex. On the Malehealth website, it is stated that:

"As the only moving part of the penis, the foreskin facilitates sexual activity. It contains nerve endings that play a part in sexual pleasure and its glands produce lubricants that help protect both the head of the penis and [in the case of heterosexual intercourse] the female vagina."

This claim - that the foreskin 'plays a part in sexual pleasure' - is debatable. On the KidsHealth website, the authors write that:

"Some people claim that circumcision either lessens or heightens the sensitivity of the tip of the penis, decreasing or increasing sexual pleasure later in life. But neither of these subjective findings has been proved."

There are many more reasons for and against circumcision - and we haven't even touched upon those that are most controversial - the religious arguments.

But whether or not we come to a conclusion about what is 'right' or 'wrong' in this matter, it is important to challenge the notions we've inherited regarding what's 'normal,' especially when it comes to sexuality.

"How About Sex? Who's Responsible For Contraception? "

2009-03-05T21:04:00.000-08:00

There's the situation where he doesn't have a condom and she isn't taking an oral contraceptive, leaving them with the choice of either not having sex at all, or having unprotected sex. Both options are bad, and usually couples will have sex anyway.

Who's Responsible for Contraception - the Man or the Woman?

Having sex for the first time with a new partner is always an exercise in silent negotiation.

Issues such as who will take the dominant role or when the undressing will begin abound and are often worked out using body language, eye contact, and other non-verbal communication cues.

Although these stealthy tools are enough to successfully answer most of the questions that arise during those initial moments of sexual bliss, the issue of contraception is not and should not be one of them.

Don´t Rely on Your Partner to "Take Care Of" Contraception

Unfortunately many women still rely on the man to bring a condom, and many men still rely on the woman to be "on the pill."

Obviously this can lead to a very unfortunate situation in which he doesn't have a condom and she isn't taking an oral contraceptive, leaving them with the choice of either not having sex at all, or having unprotected sex.

Both of these options are bad, and more often than not couples will choose to have sex anyway.

This decision not only increases their chances of an unwanted pregnancy, but also of acquiring an unwanted sexually transmitted infection such as HIV or herpes.

Remember condoms should not only be used to prevent pregnancy but to prevent the spread of STD´s as well!

The easiest way to avoid having to make such a hormonally charged decision is for both partners to take equal responsibility for having a condom on their person - be it in a pocket, a purse, a sock, where ever.

Even though it´s the man who wears it, the woman gets just as many benefits from its use, and she should feel comfortable taking the initiative to safeguard her own health and well being.

In fact some condom companies are marketing male condoms directly to women by using sexy packaging and imagery in order to promote this healthy habit.

Oral contraceptives do not prevent the spread of sexually transmitted infections and should not be the only form of protection used between new lovers.

It´s also important to remember that many women rightfully refuse to use oral contraceptives because of the negative side effects they experience while taking them or because of other health concerns.

For example women with a familial history of strokes are advised not to use oral contraceptives.

An even greater number of women discontinue using "the pill" during periods of prolonged abstinence - such as between relationships.

So even if she has used oral contraceptives with her past lovers, there´s a good chance that she is not currently using them if this is your first time having sex with each other!

Never assume a woman is using an oral contraceptive. If you are unsure, ask her.

If you are both ready to have sex, then you should be able to have an honest conversation about contraception.

She Not the Only One Deciding If Contraception Should Be Used

Another very common, and I think disturbing, trend is many men will leave it completely up to the woman to "stop" the progression of sexual activity in order to demand the use of a condom, instead of simply putting the condom on himself without needing to be told to do so by his partner.

This behavior unfairly shifts the responsibility of condom use fully onto the woman, and implies that without her demand, he would happily have sex without using a condom at all.

Why are women stereotypically placed in the sexually "responsible" role? Aren't men just as concerned about their own health as women?

Then shouldn't men be equally as likely to "stop" the sexual activity in order to use protection?

The usual justification for this scenario is that men get "carried away" in the heat of the moment and "forget" about the consequences of their sexual behaviors, whereas women do not get swept away by their sexual passions and are therefore the ones who must be "responsible" for them both.

This argument is based upon too many incorrect culturally-bound assumptions regarding female sexuality to explore in this article.

Suffice to say that women are equally as "impassioned" as men, and should not be the only ones who decide whether or not contraception will be used.

The "heat of the moment" is not an excuse for irresponsible sexual behavior for either women or men.

" 10 Fun Sex Facts"

2009-03-05T20:28:00.000-08:00

A recent visit to Manhattan's legendary Museum of Sex yielded more than a mob of 18 year-old girls giggling in the foyer -- it provided an entertaining and education look into the history of sex.

Here are some little-known sex facts that may surprise you – or at least give you ammunition for a fascinating dinner conversation!

1. The best medicine...

According to the Museum of Sex, the vibrator was originally used as a medicinal treatment for female "hysteria" during the 19th century. The vibrator-induced orgasms helped doctors dissipate hysteria's anxiety-related symptoms.

2. Say cheese!

Semen contains zinc and calcium, both of which are proven to prevent tooth decay.

3. Hop to it.

The iconic "Rabbit" is renowned for two things: excellent results and an odd smiley face on its tip. Women's Health tells us the smiley face was actually a result of conservative Japanese customs. Apparently, Japanese consumers frown upon "the production of sex toys that too closely resemble phalluses," so the smiley face was added.

4. Does he measure up?

The average size of an erect penis is 5 inches, and the average flaccid penis measures about 3 inches.

5. The sad truth.

While this fact is neither entertaining nor humorous, it’s shocking to note that homosexuality remained on the American Psychiatric Association's list of mental illnesses until 1973.

6. Protect our troops.

Today the government issues "Support our Troops" paraphernalia; however government-issued brochures and videos featured a slightly different slogan during the WWII era – "Don't forget – Put it on before you put it in." During the Second World War, many soldiers returned home with venereal diseases, costing the government millions of dollars in medical expenses.

7. Work it.

Hate the gym? You burn about 200 calories during 30 minutes of active sex.

8. What a tease!

Burlesque costumes are the epitome of sexy – think Dita Von Teese and lingerie; however, a few centuries ago, the outfits had a slightly different purpose. According to the Museum of Sex, merkins (the bottom half of burlesque costumes) were originally created as "pubic wigs" for 15th century prostitutes. The designs helped hide pubic lice and syphilis symptoms. Make sure to share this information with your boyfriend the next time he heads to Vegas with the boys.

9. Justice is served.

In Hong Kong, adulterous husbands get more than a steep monthly alimony payment – a betrayed wife is legally allowed to kill her husband if he cheats on her – but she may only do so with her bare hands.

10. Whatever happened to Southern comfort?

The sale of sex toys and vibrators is banned in Alabama and Mississippi.

"Side By Side Sex Positions"

2009-03-05T20:19:00.000-08:00

Side by side sex with the partners facing each other is probably the most common sex position apart from man on top, woman on top and rear entry.

The easiest way to get it to the sex position shown in the first photograph above is to start in the man on top missionary position and then roll over onto your sides, with the woman's legs high up as shown. It's easy to do this with your penis still in her vagina, so the flow of your lovemaking need not be interrupted. But why would you want to go over onto your sides in this way? well, for one thing, snuggling, kissing, cuddling and saying loving things to each other is both intimate and sexy, and this is an ideal position in which to do it, since there is no stress or strain on your muscles as you lie there. After you have made love in this position, which, by the way, tends to produce strong orgasms because of the long build up before you come, you can doze off with your penis still in her vagina - very sexy and a beautiful way to end your lovemaking.

You can also go into her from the rear when you are making love in the side by side position. This is easier if you have a longer penis, and somewhat more difficult if you are on the shorter side. You can enjoy many of the benefits of rear entry sex positions with less strain and, perhaps, less intense arousal - it's a sexual position that fits when the sexual passion is not running so high! Once again, you have the ability to fondle and caress each other's bodies, and the man can kiss his partner's back, which may be extremely sexy for the woman. Thrusting is a bit more restricted than it is in the rear entry position, but this will slow sex down and make it last longer as well.

Both partners are likely to find cuddling from behind very sexy - the close proximity of his genitals to her vulva and her buttocks to his penis will most likely turn on both partners if they lie together like this for any length of time.

If you want to introduce a bit of spice into the side by side routine, you can try a few sexual positions like the ones shown above. They'll have the effect of changing the tightness of her vagina and producing some interesting sensations for both of you.

The basic side by side sex positions are restful, romantic, and sensuous, it's true, but they have many other advantages as well. For a start, they allow a man to maintain his erection and last a long time. This is partly because he can't thrust as much in this position (which always tends to make a man come quickly), and partly because his partner's vagina wraps tightly around his penis, so keeping him erect. Small movements of either partner's body during sex serve to keep their sexual arousal high but aren't so stimulating that either his arousal or hers spirals rapidly out of control - this way, a man won't have any fear of coming quickly.

Then, if either partner leans back, that is to say, if they move their upper bodies away from each other (as they are lying on their sides), they can get a good look at each other, play with each other's breasts and nipples, fondle each other's buttocks, and, best of all, look down and see the sheer sexiness of his penis entering her body.

Either partner can give her clitoris the attention it deserves, arousing her slowly - or quickly, depending on how turned on she is - so that simultaneous orgasm while he has his penis inside her vagina becomes a real possibility.

With a bit of a stretch, she can reach around and feel his penis and balls; he can do the same, enjoying the wetness of her vulva and the feel of his penis sliding in and out of her body.

If a couple lean in towards each other, they can kiss, embrace and snuggle up to each other, which can produce a strong sense of intimacy and connectedness. Side by side is a loving, gentle position, in which either partner can make the hip thrusts that keep the physical sensation alive as the emotional connectedness increases.

There aren't many disadvantages to sex in the side by side position. Depending on what you think of as a disadvantage, some aspects of this kind of sex may not appeal to you, but this is a matter of personal taste rather than anything else. For example, rampant hard thrusting is not possible, as the positions are geared to more gentle lovemaking. But you can achieve deep penetration, good ejaculatory control, close touch and intimacy, and long-lasting lovemaking very satisfactorily. One great advantage is that if you're not very supple, it may be a lot easier to enjoy the side by side sex position than the man on top or woman on top positions. Side by side sex puts less strain on the lovers and require slightly a lot less physical effort than, say, straightforward man on top or woman on top positions do.

And, by the way, if you're pregnant or fat, side by side sex is a great position for a woman with a large belly!

"Other Sex Positions"

2009-03-03T23:34:00.000-08:00

Watching the movements of intercourse can be very thrilling for both partners, but especially so for men. Any position you are able to lift your body off hers and see your penis will give you extra pleasure. To get these visual thrills, you can't beat sex in the position shown in the photograph. When you vary the speed of your thrusts, it can be even more exciting; if your partner is watching as you thrust, you're likely to feel powerful, very masculine and extremely potent!

For powerful thrusting, this sexual position is just the ticket. If it's a hard 'n' horny, down 'n' dirty ride that you're looking for, try asking her to turn so that she lies with her feet over the side of the bed, her buttocks positioned just at the edge of the bed, and brace your feet against something as you thrust into her as she lies there with her vulva wide open.

This position gives the woman a thrill by allowing her to express her desire to be exhibitionist and daring! And of course having her pelvis opened up like this will produce a different set of sensations for her. It's more likely to stimulate her G spot, gives ample access to her clitoris, and allows both you and her the thrill of seeing your penis glistening with her juices as you thrust. All in all a very sexual and sexy position, but it can make some women feel vulnerable since all the action is with the man. If you're a woman who feels like this, make sure you let your partner know how you're feeling when you want to change to a more comfortable position.

In the sitting sex position shown here, a couple will feel more equal in their sexual roles. They can embrace each other with a great sense of physical and emotional connection and they will feel intimately bonded, especially if they gaze into each other's eyes. Although both partners' ability to make hip thrusts is rather limited, this sitting sex position is perfect for tranquil, tender and slow lovemaking.

This is a sexual position that allows a man to feel in charge when you're enjoying more vigorous lovemaking. It's great when you want to feel powerful and perhaps enjoy a sense of your rampant masculinity. You can get deeper penetration when your partner arches her back slightly so her vagina is raised and open. You can make this easier if you lift and support your partner's pelvis, while pulling her slightly towards you. Many women like to have their buttocks parted in this position, which will gently stretch and open their anus. Thrusting in this position creates strong sensation in her vagina, to which you can add by supporting her with one hand while you use the other to play with her clitoris.

When a woman wants to get down and dirty, there's no better way for her to express her burgeoning sexual needs by riding her man in the sitting or woman on top sex positions. She's free to move fully around, up and down, sideways: in fact, she can move in any way she likes, and she can raise and lower herself on her man's penis, bringing him great pleasure, while she ensures he penetrates her as deeply as she wishes. It's a powerful sex position in every way, and it's better than the classic woman on top position where she rides her man in a squatting position since she doesn't have the same strain on her legs. She can also give her clitoris the extra attention it needs to bring herself off, perhaps combining this with powerful thrusting against her G-spot.

If she turns round and faces her man, there's the added dimension of being able to kiss and look into each other's eyes as you move towards your orgasms. Again, the slight parting of her buttocks that her squatting position produces can feel very sexy and exciting for her. With all such positions, penetration can be very deep. The woman should lower herself carefully onto your penis; until you have established a suitable rhythm you'll want to go slowly so as to avoid jarring her cervix. To maintain the squatting position shown here, the woman needs to be quite supple and flexible in her hips and thighs. She may find it easier to kneel astride you. You can then surrender to the pleasure of what she's doing by lying back and enjoying it!

There are four more variations of familiar sex positions shown here. When you're making love, it's important to prepare properly for the moment of penetration since it signals a move from sensual play to serious, intimate connection. In the first two pictures, the couple are just playing: he has not penetrated her, but they are moving towards more intimate connection. Similarly, both you and your partner need to be ready for the physical and psychological transition to this deeper position of intimacy: above all, don't rush it. If you are both ready for penetration, you'll be fully aroused - she will have a swollen vulva, her labia will be a deeper color, her vagina will be moist with her natural lube - and your penis will be hard and fully erect, perhaps producing droplets of pre-come. You can put your hand down to her vulva to see how wet she is: she may also show you that she is ready for penetration with small wave-like motions of her hips, or even powerful thrusting movements. She may moan and press her vulva against your hand when you touch her. These are all signs that she is psychologically and physically ready for penetration, but you should still ask her if she is ready for you, or ask her if you can enter her. This gives her a sense of control over the moment of penetration - the most psychologically vulnerable moment in a woman's life. And if you have any difficulty entering her, simply guide your penis into her with your hand or ask her to position herself so that you can get in more easily. You can even ask her to guide your penis in: this can be extremely sexy!

Lastly just for fun, to make your sex relation memorable...........

"Is Other Sex Positions Necessary Besides The Basic Positions?"

2009-03-03T23:30:00.000-08:00

Why "other" sex positions? Well, if your sex life isn't packing a punch any longer, and you want a bit of orgasmic intensity in your intimate relationships, new sex positions can help you find the excitement that's gone missing. You're going to come back to the place you know well (rear entry sex, man on top sex, or woman on top sex), for sure, but in between the old favorites, you can spice up your sex life with something a bit different. But when all's said and done, new sex positions basically have to be variations of the sex positions you know and love already - after all, there are only so many ways you can put a penis into a vagina!

What's different about these sex positions is that because you approach sex from a different angle, you'll get a different sensation as you thrust or as she bucks her hips when you're into each other. The different sensations of sex come chiefly from the angle of penetration, the depth of penetration, and the degree of friction. Yes, you need to be into each other in your heads too, to get the most out of sex, but assuming that you're in bed with a partner you find desirable, sexy, and who gets you aroused, the physical pleasure of the sexual positions you try will depend on the interplay of penis size, vagina size, erection angle, vaginal tightness, how wet she is, and so on....

"Disadvantages Of Sex In The Woman On Top Position!"

2009-03-03T23:21:00.000-08:00

The man's ability to make hip thrusts is rather limited, though this may be a big advantage if it slows down his progress towards ejaculation and orgasm!

Men who need to be in control may find they feel uncomfortable when they have sex in the female-dominant position.

Men who have a hard, upright erection that lies against their belly may not be comfortable in the reverse woman on top, i.e., woman on top sex where the woman faces away from the man. The angle of the penis tends to be rather bent down in a way that is unnatural for the harder, smaller erection (or indeed a larger one that has the same sharp upward angle).

If the woman is squatting over her partner as she rides him, she may find that her knees and thighs are under some strain. But there are plenty of variations which will allow her to take a more relaxed position.

Some couples feel that this sexual position is less intimate. But sometimes you just need a raunchy session of fun in bed!

Although it's hard to think of any real disadvantages of this position, there is one danger worth mentioning: if she's riding him so hard that she comes off his penis, then descends downwards before she can stop herself, so that she squashes his cock between her perineum and his body, it can result in a penile fracture, a painful and potentially damaging injury which needs emergency medical attention. You'll know if this has happened since the pain is excruciating, and the sound of the wall of the fibrous internal erectile chamber of the penis snapping is rather loud!

"Advantages Of The Woman On Top Sex Position!"

2009-03-03T22:53:00.000-08:00

All the variations of woman on top sex are powerful positions for a woman. She has the dominant role, so she can control the pace and the speed of sex, the depth of thrusting, and the angle of penetration. All of these factors allow her to enjoy sex more by making it into an experience that allows her to satisfy her desire for pleasure and giving her control over the exact interaction of penis and vagina that gives her the most pleasure.

She can lean forward or backward as she chooses to allow his erect penis to stimulate her G-spot to best advantage. By spinning things out - usually by slowing the pace of sex down to suit herself - she may stand a much better chance of getting more aroused and having an orgasm before her partner has come.

What's more, this sex position allows her to tease her partner to distraction by raising and lowering herself on his erect penis as she kneels or squats over him. Such slow teasing, especially with shallow thrusts, can again give her a feeling of sexual power and a sense of control - not to mention the fact that her man will be entirely at her mercy when she has him in this position!

Men often find woman on top sex positions very restful - instead of leading, initiating and controlling sex, while simultaneously worrying about how quickly they are going to come, they can lie back and enjoy receiving their partner's loving attention - a luxurious, sensuous, and for most men, extremely pleasurable experience. A woman who can sense when her man is about to ejaculate, and then slow things down so that sex lasts even longer, will be rewarded by the intensity of her partner's ejaculation and orgasm when she finally rides him to orgasm. This sense of control can be extremely arousing for her as well.

It's a position that allows men to relax and in turn pay more attention to their partner's whole body. Instead of centering on her vagina and clitoris, they can stoke, caress and kiss her whole body - things which can be very important to a woman, who does not necessarily want to come at the expense of being touched all over.

The couple can kiss as they make love if she lies full-length on top of him, effectively turning this into a woman on top missionary position. This sex position also allows her to move her legs together and apart, which will tighten and relax her vagina, giving him more pleasure (though also making him come more quickly) the tighter it is. But the sensations as she does this can be almost unbearable for him - unbearably pleasurable, that is!

She can face away or towards her man, which will produce different sensations on her G-spot and allow her to choose exactly which variation of sex in this position she finds most satisfying.

If the woman rides her man while facing him, he can caress her breasts, body, clitoris and buttocks, and, with a bit of a stretch, reach down and feel his penis sliding in and out of her vagina.

When a woman rides her man while facing away from him, he can see his penis sliding in and out of her vagina, so he'll enjoy the sight of his lubricated penis penetrating her repeatedly. This can give him the sheer raunchy pleasure of the rear entry sex position, but his penis doesn't place the same level of friction on his partner's G spot and vagina as it does in straightforward rear entry, which can sometimes be uncomfortable for a woman. This mostly depends on the size and shape of her partner's penis. If he is especially well-endowed, she will also avoid the discomfort of the very deep penetration that results from rear entry sex. All in all, sex in this position is a great combination of rear entry and woman on top.

Since a woman can control the pace and power of the thrusts, she may well be able to find a position in which she can stimulate her clitoris so that she reaches orgasm during penetration.

For men who favor breasts over buttocks in their partner (in the sense that they are more turned on by breasts than buttocks, I mean!), woman on top sex in the woman facing forward position provides a delightful opportunity to fondle and cup her breasts. With a bit more effort, the man can lean forward and kiss and suck on her nipples, which may add to his partner's arousal and pleasure.

"Woman On Top Sex Positions"

2009-03-03T21:47:00.000-08:00

Woman on top sex positions are the counterpoint of the man on top positions: a reversal of roles which can turn sex into a sizzling, fizzing session of orgasmic excitement. Woman on top positions allow both partners to experience the other side of their natures: for the woman, the dominant, "Give it to me now, I'm in charge" power of leading and controlling; for the man, the more passive "I'm just going to lie back and let you have me" feeling of being taken by his woman.

It's an exciting position for sex, not just because it rings the changes, but because it does things no other position can do. Sure, there's the role reversal we talked about above, but there's much more to the popularity of woman on top sex than just its different flavor. For one thing, a woman who's riding her man's cock has the power to lean and move into the positions that make his penis tickle her G-spot. She's going to get much more pleasure from sex in this way: add in the fact that she can grind her clit against his body, and you have a recipe for a woman reaching orgasm during penetration. This might not be everyone's hottest shot, but for those women who have difficulty reaching orgasm during vaginal intercourse and who want the pleasure of throbbing around their man's erection as they come, it's no small deal.

There's another thing too: a woman's sexuality, when aroused, is just as intense - if not more so - than a man's, yet it rarely gets a chance to show itself in its full glory. So here's the ideal position for a display of sheer wantonness, of intense female sensuality at its most overt - a rousing, glorious celebration of female sexuality and female sexual power.

Pretty much all of the sex positions illustrated on this page allow a woman to pleasure her clit with the friction of rubbing on her partner's body, and to stimulate her G spot with her partner's penis in any way she chooses: she has the dominant position, she doesn't have the weight of her partner on top of her, and she can move much more freely. It's up to her, but if she wants to take her pleasure, then this is the position in which to do so.

So here's the first one for you to try. It's the one we all think of when we hear the words "Do you want to go on top, darling?" The woman sits on her man, almost in a kneeling position; he has his legs either outstretched flat on the bed, or he brings them up slightly at the knees - this increases his feeling of contact with her body and can add an extra sexy spice to the position as his balls press against her vulva!

She can lean either forwards or backwards in whatever way most suits the couple's penis and vagina - the angle of his dangle and the angle of her vagina will together determine which of these positions is the one that gives you the biggest sexual thrills! But most likely if you're a man graced with a hard stiff cock which has a tendency to stick straight up along your belly when it's erect, you won't be able to accommodate the positions shown here, where the woman is leaning back: sex in this position will simply bend your penis too far to be comfortable. You can work out how far you as a couple can go - but she's likely to want more of this than you are, because it presses your penis on those delightfully sensual areas of her vaginal wall - the ones that are most stimulated by sexual thrusting.

So the next pics show another take on the same deal: having her lean forward. This is the sexual position for when you're both feeling intimate and sexy. You can kiss, cuddle, enjoy the sensations of your bodies pressing against each other, fondle breasts, buttocks, and balls, and reach down to play with her clitoris and feel yourself entering her vagina. And she still has flexibility with her legs - she can move them back or forwards as you see here to get the greatest pleasure:

To take the woman on top sex position a step further, you can adapt it to an "edge-of-the-bed-woman-on-top" scenario. See the first picture below. She's got loads of thrusting pelvis power and she can ride you just as fiercely as she likes. For you as a man, accustomed to taking charge in the man on top or rear entry sexual positions, this kind of position can be a great relief - at last, you can just lie back and enjoy it! And enjoy it you will - it's so exciting to feel her hotness and wetness riding up and down your shaft: in fact, it's an experience that can transport you to a different level of sexual pleasure. When you add in the fact that she can ride you back and forth and move her hips in a circular pattern as well, it's no mystery why the woman on top position seems to be a hot favorite of almost everyone!

And for more thrills how about turning woman on top into a sitting sex position? Woman on top sex makes it easier to move into other positions than just about any other position in the sexual repertoire. And if you read the page on sitting sex, you'll know that it's wonderfully intimate, cuddly, and emotionally connecting (and great for making sex last a long time, too!). here's how you might do it:

Now, see the point about how flexible your penis has to be to take this position. Not all men will be able to do this, and fewer will be able to enjoy it:

Here's a thought - you like the sight of her bottom while you make love, right? It's what makes sex in the rear entry position so wonderful for men - the powerful stimulus of her buttocks inviting your cock into that moist crevice! OK, well how about combining the best of the woman on top sexual position with the best of the rear entry position - have a look at this punchy position:

And why would you want to make the positions below part of an excursion into woman on top sex? Well, just for fun, really, to see if they press your buttons and give you a greater thrill.

"Anal Sex Positions"

2009-03-02T20:29:00.000-08:00

Anal sex is a firm favorite with many men and women - and there are lots of sex positions in which you can try it.

Whether or not you like the idea, anal sex is very popular - almost two thirds of couples have tried it or do it regularly (and that's just the ones who admit it!). And with good reason, too, for the anus is rich in sensitive nerve endings that can add an extra thrill to the pleasure of sex - not to mention the fact that something so forbidden, something so naughty, takes us into a whole realm of taboo-breaking.

And why's it so popular? Well, in any position sex up the anus has one big advantage for both men and women - it's tight up there! There's nothing a man likes more than a tight hole to penetrate, and they don't come much tighter than the anus. Of course it wasn't made for entry, just exit, so there's some skill in reversing the traffic up this one way street: and sex positions are a more important factor in anal pleasure than in any other form of sex.

You've heard all the warnings, I'm sure - about not transferring shit from the anus to the vagina, using a condom because the rectum easily transmits viruses and bacteria (we're talking AIDS here), washing well, and using plenty of lube. Once you've got all that out of the way, you need to take up the right position for anal penetration.

If you want a straightforward anal thrill, the classic rear entry sex position is the way forward, so to speak. If you're experienced in anal sex, you'll be able to push in slowly, using lots of lube, until you're past the resistance of the inner anal sphincter. There may be a feeling of needing to poo, but hopefully this will pass quickly. If your partner's not into douching, you might want to use a condom to avoid getting shit on your cock. If you're not experienced in anal sex, you might want to try with a finger first, to get the feel of it.

Short fingernails are essential if you're a man going in by the backdoor. It's fun to start by massaging around your partner's anus, gently probing the center of her sphincter muscle with a few teasing strokes as you move your well-lubed fingers over the opening. If she can relax into this, the feelings it produces can be very sensuous and enjoyable. If she objects on the basis that this is just too dirty a place to play around, try washing together in the shower beforehand, running your fingers around and up into the anal canal while under the water jets so you can clean up before trying anything more.

As your partner relaxes, you can gradually insert more than the tip of your finger into her, moving it around in circles as you do so. You can gently begin to stretch the anus, moving your fingers around in a circular pattern as you do so.

What you're aiming for is to get her relaxed enough to be able to take your penis without clenching up. Her main fear is that she's not going to be big enough, or maybe that she'll shit on you. You'll need to reassure her that this isn't likely to happen - and even if it does, so what? You can easily clean up in the shower.

So: what of anal sex positions? They're mostly the same as vaginal sex positions, except that rear entry takes on a new meaning! You can do the rear entry position while you're kneeling, as shown here, standing, or lying on the bed. All you have to do is position yourselves so that you're aiming for her anus rather than her vagina.

As always, athleticism counts for a lot! If she's flexible, and you're; strong, this can be a great way to enjoy a vigorous session of anal penetration....

If you're not, you'll probably want to try something more achievable like the anal version of the side by side sex position as shown here.

And it follows that you can do anal while you're lying down, too. Since a lot of women feel very vulnerable in this position even when they're being penetrated vaginally, you might want to give some thought to reassuring your partner and telling her how much you love her (and how grateful you are for the privilege of being in this position!)

"Kneeling Sex Positions"

2009-03-02T20:23:00.000-08:00

Sitting and kneeling positions are probably a novelty more than anything else for most people. They never feature in the lists of people's top ten favorite positions - one survey showed they were used less than once in every fifty times a couple have sex. This may be because they're just not very enjoyable, difficult to get into, or simply not very satisfying physically. Their biggest advantage must lie in the fact that they're so unusual and it's different and exciting to try them out. Having said that, sitting positions can be good for a couple who lack flexibility and who therefore want to make love in a chair rather than on the bed.

"Standing Sex Positions"

2009-03-02T19:57:00.000-08:00

Standing sexual positions may require considerable physical effort to achieve penetration and then keep his penis in her vagina, unless it's a case of straightforward rear entry sex with the man standing and the woman bending over, although even here the difference in height between the man and the woman may be a problem when it comes to penetration. If the couple is trying a more adventurous and strenuous posture, such as him holding her around her ass with her feet off the floor (perhaps with her legs locked around his legs or waist) as she rides his penis, he will need real strength to maintain the posture - the danger being that if he lets her slip, his penis will be bent downwards and injured.

Often standing positions seem very exciting when a couple are in the mood for an urgent bout of sex, desperate for a quickie, so to speak, but in practice they don't live up to the excitement - the physical effort involved, the tendency for the man to come very quickly, the lack of intimate touch, and so on, all tend to diminish the pleasurable sensations and make standing sex a brief and perhaps slightly disappointing affair. On the other hand, if you just want a quick and intense orgasm, it can work well.

Standing sex positions are probably the most difficult for the majority of people. For one thing, you both need to be exactly the right height for penetration to be possible: if you're not, one of you will end up arching your back to allow penetration, or standing on a pile of books or a piece of furniture to get your penis and vagina in line. This can be uncomfortable, and distract from the physical pleasure of sex. They are, however, versatile positions, in the sense that they can be used anywhere at any time with only a little undressing (or indeed none at all!)

"Sitting Sex Positions"

2009-03-02T19:50:00.000-08:00

You might think of sitting sex positions as involving a chair- and so it can! But there's another way of making sitting sex into an enjoyable interlude, and that's to include it in the flow of sex as you move from one position to another in a prolonged session of lovemaking. In the pictures below, the couple have moved from woman on top to kneeling to sitting in one easy sequence.

Sitting sex, especially sitting sex in a chair, is especially good for producing an almost meditative state, a relaxed and dreamy state of mind where a couple can allow themselves to drift off without feeling pressured to perform or keep sex going. It's certainly not a sexual position suitable for vigorous sex: it's much more for slow, sensuous, thoughtful sex where the couple can kiss lovingly and tenderly. When a woman is sitting on top of her man in the chair position, she is much more in control of sex than he is. She can move gently up and down, embrace him more or less tightly, or rock her pelvis back and forth - all movements which will produce different sensations and waves of sexual and emotional feelings. If she is supple enough and confident enough, she can even lean as far back as she can get, though like the woman on top positions, this may bend her man's penis further down than is comfortable for him.

There is one variation of sitting sex which is suitable for wilder, more abandoned sex, and that's the edge of the bed sitting position. The man sits on the edge of the bed, his legs dangling over the edge, and his partner sits on him, facing him, her legs bent at the knees and her shins resting on the edge of the bed outside her man's legs. She can hold his shoulders and the man can place his feet on the floor to give them stability. In this sex position a woman can rotate her hips so as to produce strong sensations of friction between her clit and his body, and on his penis in her vagina.

Sitting sex positions seem to be the least popular of all, according to most surveys. This must be for a reason! That might be that we are simply accustomed to having sex in a bed, or it could be because it's quite difficult to get good penetration and ease of movement. If a man is sitting and the woman is going to ride him, she has to have somewhere to put her legs. The pictures above show how she can do this. Obviously these sex positions will require more physical effort and feel less comfortable than a sexual position where both partners' bodies are supported by a bed or the floor.

"Advantages Of Man On Top Sex!"

2009-02-28T20:04:00.000-08:00

It's a romantic position, and you can gaze into each other's eyes as you make love. And that's good because if you're into a romantic affair, making love is always more enjoyable when you have romantic, sensuous sex that conveys your affection for each other.

The woman can bring her legs up in many different angles and positions which will alter the pressure on her sensitive vaginal spots and the head and shaft of your penis. This allows you to fine tune your sex play until you find the position that provides the greatest pleasure for both of you.

The angle of your partner's legs and the height and angle of her pelvis (which can be altered by placing a cushion under her butt) will alter the depth to which you are able to penetrate her. Deeper penetration in this position can be extremely pleasurable for you as the male partner, though if you have a long penis you may need to adjust what you're doing so that you don't go into her vagina too deeply and hit her cervix - she may find this a thrust too far!

You can kiss your partner's breasts and nipples as you make love, a sexy and exciting thing for both of you.

You can kiss her mouth as you make love, which adds to the romance of this position.

And better yet, you can talk to each other easily as you have sex in the man on top position - which is a good way of communicating your likes and dislikes, and letting each other know what you want and what you don't want!

You can make deep hip thrusts during lovemaking which will add to your sexual pleasure and the power of your orgasm and ejaculation.

Your partner may like to have a sense of being dominated, or may enjoy the feeling of being protected by you. It's an intimate position in which women can feel snuggled and loved as they give themselves to their partner.

Man on top sex allows for a lot of skin to skin contact which can be sensuous and erotic for both of you.

Depending on how much you're supporting yourself on your hands and arms, your partner may be able to reach down and play with her clitoris: given enough time, she may reach orgasm during intercourse.

If you kneel back, you can watch your penis moving in and out of your partner as you make love: you'll get turned on fast!

There's great satisfaction for a man in holding his partner and thrusting deeply into her - it seems to fulfill some deep need. Certainly, the urge to thrust can be very powerful, and the orgasm and ejaculation that comes from doing so can be very deeply fulfilling.

It's very easy to roll over into the side by side sex position from the conventional man on top: in fact, side by side sex positions are difficult to get into in any other way.

"Disadvantages Of Man On Top Sex!"

2009-02-28T19:51:00.001-08:00

You have to support yourself on your elbows, knees, feet and hands if you don't want to squash your partner. Although lying on her can be nice for a while, you need to get off her before she stops breathing!

You won't be able to feel much of her body - with your hands, that is - when you're making love in the man on top position, unless you try some sexual acrobatics. In particular, unless you're kneeling as you penetrate her (which may not be possible for less flexible men, or men with a short penis), you won't necessarily be able to get to her clitoris as you thrust. In some variations of the man on top position, especially those where you're supporting your weight on extended arms as you thrust, so that your bodies are not in close proximity, your partner may be able to play with her own clitoris, but let's face it, this isn't the same as having you do it!

Some couples place a vibrator between them or use a vibrating toy which fits around the man's penis to help the woman reach orgasm during intercourse. Then again, you might find that she gets enough pleasure just from having you penetrate her and thrust into her vagina, especially if she's already come through oral sex or masturbation before you make love.

The man may get tired if lovemaking goes on for a long time, as his weight rests on his arms.

The woman's ability to thrust her hips and pelvis tends to be rather limited, since she has a big man (that's you!) lying on top of her. Get off her and she'll be able to move her hips in a sexy way that will have you shooting your load before you know it. Then again, if she wants, she can lie back and enjoy it! Either way, she won't feel like she's in charge of sex in this position, though!

Men who come quickly during sex may find that the deep hip thrusts possible in this position will speed up their ejaculation even more. And self-restraint can be difficult, since the position is so arousing!

"Man On Top - Reverse"

2009-02-28T19:14:00.000-08:00

This position can be very exciting, because it allows deep penetration, the man can view his partner's buttocks as he enters her, and it provides both partners with a sense of taking/being taken, which might be something you find sexually exciting. It's certainly a good variation for those times you feel very horny, but you want a compromise between rear entry and conventional man on top sex!

"What Happens When She Puts Her Legs In The Air In Man On Top Positions?"

2009-02-28T18:47:00.000-08:00

The main difference between sexual positions comes down to two things. The first is the angle of penetration - the angle at which his penis enters her vagina. Any change in the orientation of the two partners' bodies can change the angle at which his penis thrusts into her vagina, and of course this will change the sensations that both partners feel. The other major difference, needless to say, is the tightness of her vagina - anything that tightens her vagina will tend to make sex feel better for him (provided there is still enough lubrication to ensure that the friction does not become unpleasant) and possibly for her. Unfortunately many women find that even a slight change of angle of entry can cause unpleasant friction in the vagina; this is especially true if his penis begins to rub too hard on her sensitive spots such as her G spot.

Having said that, an interesting variation which makes man on top sex feel better for both partners is the one in which she raises her legs progressively further up his body. The most common variation is when she places her feet on his calves, or wraps her legs around his thighs - see the pictures.

As a general rule, the higher she raises her legs, the deeper his penis will go into her. What's more, she can pull him deeper into her, which is delicious for both partners, especially if she's into deep penetration. Sex in this position can be very fulfilling for the man, since men often crave deep penetration - it's something genetic, no doubt, about ejaculating as near their partner's cervix as possible. But when we have sex for fun, such ancient genetic impulses can be used to enhance our pleasure - and if she's flexible enough to raise her legs as shown in the picture below, then both partners' enjoyment may increase greatly.

As you might expect, when she gets her legs right back - see the picture below - the man can get his cock as deeply into her as he's ever likely to do. This can be very exciting, make him come quickly, and allow him to thrust deeply and powerfully. Hopefully he's not going to thrust too deeply, though, for if he does he might hit her cervix with the end of his penis, which is sometimes very painful for a woman. It's essential that both partners are able to tell the other what they want and don't want, so as to ensure sex is a great experience for both of them.

As you might expect, when she gets her legs right back - see the picture below - the man can get his cock as deeply into her as he's ever likely to do. This can be very exciting, make him come quickly, and allow him to thrust deeply and powerfully. Hopefully he's not going to thrust too deeply, though, for if he does he might hit her cervix with the end of his penis, which is sometimes very painful for a woman. It's essential that both partners are able to tell the other what they want and don't want, so as to ensure sex is a great experience for both of them.

As you might expect, when she gets her legs right back - see the picture below - the man can get his cock as deeply into her as he's ever likely to do. This can be very exciting, make him come quickly, and allow him to thrust deeply and powerfully. Hopefully he's not going to thrust too deeply, though, for if he does he might hit her cervix with the end of his penis, which is sometimes very painful for a woman. It's essential that both partners are able to tell the other what they want and don't want, so as to ensure sex is a great experience for both of them.

"The Basics Of The Man On Top Sex Position"

2009-02-28T18:30:00.000-08:00

If you're sexually experienced, then you probably already know how man on top sex works. But for the benefit of those who aren't, the man positions himself over the woman with his weight more or less supported on his arms, knees and legs, while she lies on her back with her partner's legs inside or outside hers. There are many variations of this basic position, all of which give a different experience to the man and the woman - for example, if she has her legs outside his, her vagina won't be as tight as it would be if she had her legs inside his. You can see how man on top sex works in the pictures (all of which expand when you click on them).

A lot of people think that in this sexual position the woman's movements are restricted by the weight of her partner, but that's not entirely true - a woman does have the freedom to thrust or rock her pelvis to some extent: in fact, she can add greatly to the enjoyment of sex for both partners if she moves her hips to meet his thrusting with some energy of her own.

"But Why Stick With The Basic Man On Top Sex Position? Try, Having Sex With The CAT. That's The "Coital Alignment Technique", Of Course."

2009-02-28T18:20:00.000-08:00

We all know that a woman's clitoris may not get a lot of stimulation during sex in the basic man on top position - for one thing, neither partner can reach it that easily. But surely, you might say, it can be stimulated by the man's body pressing on it? And, yes, you'd be right, but to stimulate it in a way that helps her reach orgasm isn't as straightforward as you might think.

Basically, the partners need to rock their bodies against each other in such a way that her clitoris is gently pressed against his body. This means no rampant thrusting: instead, after he has entered her, he moves his whole body upwards (in relation to hers) so that the base of his penis makes contact with the general area of her clitoris. Then they rock in a coordinated way, so that every time he moves up, she moves down. The idea is to produce a series of small bumps between her clitoris and the general area of the base of his penis, so that she gradually builds towards orgasm.

"Basic" Sex: The Man On Top Position (Also Known As The Missionary Position)

2009-02-28T18:06:00.000-08:00

When you ask people what positions they like to have sex in, the most popular answer from men is "Rear entry" or "Woman on top". Women say they prefer "Woman on top" more than any other sex position. But the odd thing is that we know most people have more sex in the man on top position than any other! Now, just how do you explain that?

I don't really know, but I wonder if people have sex in the man on top position because it's safe, familiar, comfortable and enjoyable, while they secretly think that other positions might be more arousing, more exciting or more satisfying?

Men certainly like the idea of rear entry sex. After all, there aren't many things more sexually exciting than penetrating your partner from behind, watching your penis moving in and out of her vagina while her bottom frames the picture! Yet men often reach orgasm quickly in this sex position, so intercourse doesn't last long, and it may not afford much opportunity for emotional connection with your partner. Women may find the idea of rear entry sex "naughty", raw, passionate or lustful, but in reality it may mean they don't feel very connected with their man.

And woman on top sex is a very different thing to man on top sex - once she's on top, a woman may find herself taking the lead, controlling the pace of sex and determining its rhythm. All these things are exciting once in a while, but perhaps what we really crave is the certainty, the established roles, the security of man on top sex - or maybe it just feels good for both partners?

Yes, that's partly true: it can certainly feel good for men, who can make deep pelvic thrusts, enjoy a sense of dominance over their partner, and have powerful orgasms. But what about a woman's pleasure? Does she get much out of sex in the man on top position? Her clitoris is rarely stimulated, she may not reach orgasm, and she feels the weight of her man on her.....but there are compensations. The couple can look into each others eyes, have extensive bodily contact, and enjoy the emotional rewards of being on top and underneath (in other words - he feels dominant or protective, she feels receiving or protected). Surely, man on top sex reaffirms a man's lustiness and sexual power, and a woman's desirability and sexuality, and in addition, as she permits her man to penetrate her, she feels safe, secure and protected. No wonder it's so popular.

"Sex Positions"

2009-02-28T17:36:00.000-08:00

This list of sex positions describes the sex positions which people may adopt for the purpose of sexual intercourse and other sexual acts. Sexual acts are generally described by the positions the participants take in order to perform those acts. Since the number of positions that can be used for sex is essentially limitless, this list is not exhaustive.

But still I am trying to explain the various male - female sex positions that are known by me. From my various readings and experiences from my friends.

"What's the Deal with Penis Size?"

2009-02-27T18:37:00.000-08:00

There are many questions in this one. Does penis size matter? Do we actually fit together? And what makes a good lover?

The short answer to the question about size is kind of like that famous presidential quote: it matters to some of the people, some of the time... There has been surprisingly little research in this area, but you’ll find information on that research through the link below.

For the most part people’s size interests take a back seat to other considerations. Aside from your friends who are size queens, the same person might be happy driving a Toyota Tercel one day, and an SUV the next. And as folks on the discussion board are pointing out, small can sometimes be better, depending one what you want to do with it.

"Exploring Sex and Intimacy Without Intercourse"

2009-02-27T18:06:00.000-08:00

Sexual Intercourse = “Real Sex”

When most people talk about “sex” they mean intercourse. We’re raised to understand that “real sex” is all about penile-vaginal intercourse. Beyond this the only variation we are supposed to be interested in is finding new sexual positions for intercourse. Sexual behaviors like masturbation (solo or mutual), oral sex , phone sex, massage, writing love letters, etc… are all seen as nice “additions”, but not the main event. Even the term “foreplay” seems to suggest that the things we do before intercourse are nothing more than a build up to the real show.

There is no doubt that sexual intercourse is a staple in a majority of people’s sexual diets. Because most of us are raised to think that having intercourse is having sex, we build up huge anticipation about intercourse and prioritize it, whether we like it or not. One result of this is widespread sexual dissatisfaction for long term relationships and marriages.

On the one hand the physical intimacy that comes with intercourse is understandably attractive. On the other, there are many sexual activities that offer the same, even more, intimacy. In terms of actual sexual stimulation, it is safe to say that there are thousands of sexual activities that provide more stimulation than intercourse.

Getting Beyond Intercourse

Still, it’s hard for people to get around this. Most of us don’t really challenge our status quo definition of sex until we have to. There are many times in our lives where intercourse stops “working” for us, and we might be forced to broaden our sexual horizons:

* When two people have been in a long relationship and sex seems “boring”
* If you or your partner are undergoing, preparing for, or recovering from medical treatment or procedures.
* If you or your partner are dealing with depression, anxiety, or other acute mental health issues.
* If you or your partner are living with chronic or temporary pain.

These are only a few examples of ordinary events and changes that happen in most of our lives that can impact the way we can, or want to, have intercourse. Whether you are currently living with one of these experiences, or if you’re just interested in getting more creative with your sex life, here are some ideas of how to explore sexual behavior and intimacy with your partner without having intercourse.

Sexual Touch

We tend to associate sexual touching with a sort of immature sexuality. Most of our earliest sexual experiences involve touching, often fumbling at first, trying to discover what our partners body feels like, what makes it excited, what it shrinks away from. This experimentation is often done in the dark, or in a hurry, and we don’t always get the chance to slowly and thoughtfully explore every inch of our partner’s body.

Having sex through touch can be an unbelievably intimate and powerful experience, as touch can convey so much: our love, our lust, our desire, our interest in knowing more, and experiencing more from our partner.

Non-Verbal & Non Touching Intimate Sexual Connections

We communicate non verbally, and share energy with people around us all the time. When you’re around someone who is angry or anxious, you may pick up on that energy.
When someone is gazing into your eyes with a look of desire, you may feel a tingle in your body, the thrill of being lusted after.

This sort of energy exchange occurs when we’re having sex too. Usually we don’t talk about it, and it just happens. It happens without our intent, but it comes out of the intensity of the sexual energy that is flowing inside of us.

Tapping into this energy, and using it intentionally, can offer sexual intimacy on a level that you have never experienced. All of this, from not having intercourse!

Sexual Intimacy Through Talking

Classically, “dirty talk” is seen as a raunchy element of sex. It’s something you do to get your partner going, or it’s something you do while having sex. We all have an idea of what it is, but most of us are also nervous about doing it, and unsure about how it works, or how to do it well.

But there are far more ways to enjoy deep sexual intimacy and pleasure through language. Keeping your sex life hot is in part about learning how to take your partner to the point of extreme sexual intensity and not pushing them over the top, but letting them float there. From sharing sexy talk with your partner, to reading erotic stories to each other, to phone sex, to cyber sex, using your mind, and your mouth to draw your partner in and make a connection, can be a heady experience.

"Sexuality and Body Image"

2009-02-27T17:08:00.000-08:00

Body image, like sexuality, is one of those very broad terms that everyone uses but few take the time to analyze for themselves. While most research on body image focuses on how we think and feel about the shape and weight of our bodies, body image can incorporate:

* How important our physical appearance is to us
* How we see our “real” bodies (what happens when we look in the mirror, touch ourselves, smell ourselves, etc.)
* How we imagine our body looks
* How we imagine other people look at our bodies.

One of the most important things to remember is that body image is largely an effect of the ideals of beauty that are specific to a time and place. Different societies at different times had ideals of beauty that were radically different from the skinny, practically emaciated body type society holds as "perfect" today. The impact of body image is experienced by most of us in deeply personal ways. But it's important to remember that we are not born with poor body images--it's something we learn.

Body image and sexuality are often thrown together in the media, but what do we know about the relationship between sexuality and body image?
Body image can impact sexuality
When we think about body image and sexuality, we tend to think about it as a fairly simple relationship: If you grow up with positive messages about your body, you'll be more comfortable with it. You'll also likely be more comfortable having sex, and therefore have better sex. If you feel bad about your body, the opposite will be true.

But it isn't that simple. Our body image and our sexuality can impact each other in unexpected ways. Consider a study that examined the connection between body image and risky sexual practices. The study found that:

* Men with more positive body image were more likely to engage in risky sexual behaviors.
* Women with more positive body image were less likely to engage in risky sexual behaviors.

This study reveals two important aspects about the relationship between sexuality and body image. First, body image can have a different impact on different people. Second, having a “positive” body image doesn’t always mean positive sexual effects.
Sexuality can impact body image
Since the 1960s, feminist therapists and sex educators have been working with women to help them have more positive sexual experiences, specifically helping them learn how to sexually satisfy themselves and teach their partners how to sexually satisfy them. One of the things this work, and the many books it has spawned, reveals is the way that sexual exploration and sexual behavior can have a positive impact on body image.
Positive body image and sexual satisfaction do not always come together
Many people assume that those with positive body image reap the rewards in the bedroom. But the connection between the two is more complicated.

A study of women age 35 to 55, for example, showed that poor body image was related to a reduction in sexual desire and sexual activity. But the same study found that when the women were having sex, their satisfaction was very high. A substantial 72 percent of women in the study reported being physically and emotionally satisfied in their sexual relationship, and 71 percent reported general sexual satisfaction.
Body image is general--sexual satisfaction is specific.
One possible explanation for the above finding is that body image doesn't account for the unique and personal experience of having sex. Some people may be shy and self-conscious about their bodies when they are out in the world, but they may be uninhibited and comfortable while having sex with a partner they trust. Thus, a woman who is bombarded with messages that her aging body is no longer beautiful may feel the weight of that through a decrease in how "sexy" she feels or how often she wants sex. But when she's having sex, the satisfaction may be unrelated to her body image.

"What Makes a Great Lover?"

2009-02-27T16:55:00.000-08:00

Browse the virtual shelves of Amazon (or better yet, go to an actual bookstore) and you’ll find hundreds of books that promise to reveal the secrets to becoming a great lover. Go to any magazine stand and you’ll see dozens of magazines with tips on how to drive your lover wild in bed, be the greatest lover known to man, and invent levels of sexual satisfaction that defy gravity and the laws of nature (and that doesn’t even include the porn magazines).

The message these books convey is that with the right teacher and enough hard work you can actually become a great lover, the kind of person has all the right lines and all the right moves. Someone who, in short, can turn hop into bed with anyone and create an unforgettable night (or day) of unparalleled sexual bliss.

I’d like to propose that this is a flawed premise. I don't believe that anyone is great with everyone. I don't buy that with the right technique or know how you can have great sex with every single person you encounter. Phenomenal sex is, to some extent, about the chemistry between the two (or more) people having it. You might be someone’s idea of the perfect lover, but with another partner (even if you do all the same things, say all the same things and ear all the same things) the sex may fall flat.

While there is something to be said for sexual technique , and knowing how to talk about sex , a “great lover” is not in the moves or the talk, it’s in the whole package.

Even the definition of what is a great lover, can be slippery. If you ask ten people you'll get ten different answers. In a way, becoming a “great lover” is probably about taking things one partner at a time. You can learn things in one sexual relationship that applies to others, but sexuality is so subjective and personal, that you can’t always generalize experience, technique, or taste. One person’s sexual turn on may be another person’s deal-breaking turn off.

Is there a way to find out what your partners (past and present) think about sex with you? There is...Ask them! I wouldn’t suggest doing this in the middle of, or immediately before, you’re going to have sex. And don't do it unless you feel like you can handle the answer. But pick a time and place that seems safe and neutral, be prepared to possibly hear things that might be challenging (and be prepared to take a compliment when it’s offered), and ask your partner to talk about what they like about sex with you, and what, if anything, they’d like to do differently.

"What Is Sex ?"

2009-02-27T15:50:00.000-08:00

What is sex may seem like a silly question for an adult to ask, but after speaking and corresponding with thousands of people over the years I’ve come to believe that many of our problems about sex are actually problems of definition. As such every search for information, tips and techniques, or answers to sexual problems can benefit from taking a moment to make sure we know what we’re talking about when we talk about sex.

Definitions Of Sex

“Sex is something you do, sexuality is something you are.” This way of understanding sex highlights the difference between the act of sex and the individual experience of sexuality, which is an intrinsic part of who we are, one that can’t be separated out of ourselves any more than our ethnicity or religious/spiritual beliefs.

Dictionary definitions of sex tend to be less literary, offering several definitions including:

1. Sex is a way of distinguishing male and female members of a species, usually by referencing their reproductive functions.
2. Sex refers to coitus or intercourse, an act that can result in reproduction.
3. Sex refers to the genitals.

The answer you get to the question “what is sex” depends largely on who you ask. A doctor might tell you that sex is defined by hormones in your body; a therapist might say that sex is all in your head; a guru may tell you that sex is about getting closer to God. Given such broad definitions, it can be helpful to narrow your focus and figure out what aspect of sex you want to learn more about.

Statistics About Sex

One way to define sex is to find out what others are doing in the name of sex, and try to count and categorize these behaviors. It can be informative and reassuring to discover the kinds of sexual diversity in the world (indeed many researchers choose to look at sexual behaviors in other animal species, not just humans). But always keep in mind that statistics can only capture one aspect of sex, and for the thousands of individuals who are counted, millions are not.

Sex Is Our Body

The most obvious and most frequently talked about part of sex is the physical part that involves our bodies. The sexual parts of our bodies are usually considered to be the parts that relate to reproduction: the genitals. But every part of our body can play a role in sex. We may use our feet to physically get us to where we’re going to have sex, we might use our elbows, thighs, or eyelashes during sex play, our earlobes may be involved in unexpected ways. Learning more about how your body works when having sex, and how you can work it more, and better, can expand your definition of sex exponentially.

Sex Is Our Mind

It’s often said that the greatest sex organ is the mind. How we think and feel about our bodies and ourselves, and how we interpret the physical contact we have with others is really what distinguishes good sex from bad. While some people worry about “over thinking” sex, the fact is that exploring our sexual thoughts and feelings may be much more important than trying on the latest sex position or role play outfit.

Sex Is Our Spirit

Sex and religion may appear to be unlikely bedfellows, but most major religions have a lot to say about sexuality. And besides, saying that sex can be defined in spiritual terms doesn’t have to include organized religion. For some, sex is spiritual because they do feel like it brings them closer to a “higher power.” For others it is their personal religious beliefs that guide their sexual behaviors. Regardless of how it impacts you, your religious or spiritual beliefs and convictions make up part of your personal definition of sex, and exploring them is another way of exploring sex.

Sex Is Our Health

Expanding a definition of sex to include sexual health is a good way to bring all these different parts of sex together. Over 30 years ago the World Health Organization defined sexual health as:

".....a state of physical, emotional, mental and social well-being in relation to sexuality; it is not merely the absence of disease, dysfunction or infirmity. Sexual health requires a positive and respectful approach to sexuality and sexual relationships, as well as the possibility of having pleasurable and safe sexual experiences, free of coercion, discrimination and violence. For sexual health to be attained and maintained, the sexual rights of all persons must be respected, protected and fulfilled.”